The Bugs Bunny Tooth....A true story.

Some where in the winter of 1981 or 1982 I decided to leave work a little early. The weather was cold outside and I worked at a country club so there wasn't much to do. Everyone should believe in something and I believe it was time for a drink or two. Or three or four or five. Seven hours later it was time to go home so I ambled out to the 1969 Dodge Dart I was driving at the time and pointed it in a general direction and off I went. Somewhere about a mile from the house I took a quick cat nap and awoke to the brake lights of the car in front of me. I opened my mouth to yell and proceeded to bite the steering wheel with my two front teeth. And they broke right in half. The one on the right just hung in mid air suspended by the nerve. Ouch.
Early the next morning I was in need of some dental work. One of the members that I had played golf with was a man named Wilson who was a dentist. (No, this is not a Tom Hanks stranded on an island propping up a volleyball and yanking out his own teeth moment, his name was Wilson) Due to the fact that I was broke and he was late for his tee time I got a quick double root canal and two caps for my smile. And one of them was a lot bigger than the other. It was then named the Bugs Bunny tooth. And it stayed firmly in place for 25 years.
Until one day when my personal life was falling apart in 2006 I took a nice bite out of an apple and Bugs had left the mouth. Hitched a ride on a fast moving Golden Delicious out of town. In reality it was stuck in the apple when I looked down at it. Well that sure sucked. I had an appointment selling insurance ( I told you my life was falling apart) so I grabbed a bottle of some sort of glue from the store and got Bugs back in my head long enough to sell. Or so I thought. Half way through my enlightening display on the need for insurance, Bugs made another run for freedom. My tooth tumbled almost in slow motion before landing squarely in the middle of my future clients glass coffee table. Tink,tink,tink,tink. Always being able to think quick on my feet I grabbed my wayward crown, jabbed it onto it's post and said,"I recommend not skipping the dental insurance". They bought everything I could sell them. Just to get me out of the house.
Fast forward to today. After one hour and thirty minutes in a dentists chair Bugs is no more. The nice new front teeth will be here in two weeks and all is well. But for some strange reason I feel a sense of loss. Not for the tooth itself. It was bigger than the other one, slightly discolored and had a rough edge on the back side. No, the loss is from the memories. Painful as they were they served to remind of mistakes made and not to be repeated. It also gave me a built in excuse to not be my best. A fall back position of failure. And now it is no more. Still it does look good to look in the mirror and not utter "What's up Doc?" Hossenfeffer for dinner anyone?