Swimming with bow legged women.

I did promise to complete the trifecta today and write about women and how to have successful, meaningful and nurturing relationships with them. I highly recommend getting out a pen and some paper for you men out there. For the ladies don't bother trying to memorize it and discuss it with your man because he is not listening anyway. You can print a copy and put it inside his golf bag and have a better chance of getting through. Or start undressing with each sentence to hold his attention. Tell him there will be a quiz that he must get correct if he wants to boot knock. Now you have a fighting chance.
Maybe this is where my problem is. I have been divorced twice and am currently happily married. All three women are much more of an asset to the human race than yours truly. That isn't much of a surprise. Because opposites have to attract. Try and explain Heidi Klum and Seal without it. Can you imagine being married to someone just like you? I would be in Hell. No, I don't give a crap who won the Triple Crown in 1979. If I wanted to know why Democrats lost the House I would ask. No, I don't want to listen the classic rock station unless it's a choice between that or that damn talk radio garbage. No, I don't want to pull your finger and I do know why the chicken crossed the road because you told me yesterday. Could you just shut up during the sad parts of the movie? See what I mean. I don't like me and I'm not married to me.
So with all that here is the advice. 1. Men, don't talk. When your woman is venting she wants you to listen. 2. Men, talk. Let her know what you think. 3. Men, tell her she is attractive. Women love to hear that their man still desires them. 4. Men, don't tell her she turns you on. The last thing a woman wants to hear is how sexy she is when she is feeling bloated or crampy or tired. 5. Men, take care of things for her. When your woman finds you have fixed a toilet or hung a shower rod it's like foreplay. 6. Men, She is not a child and doesn't need you to do everything for her. She survived long before you showed up and she will survive long after the restraining order has expired. 7. Oh, to hell with it.....I have not the slightest idea what works here. For every ying there is a yang and every ping there is a pong.
If you really want to know the secret, look up my Mom and Dad. They have been married 50 years. To each other!



Till next...........