It was a normal drive on a lazy Sunday afternoon with Scarlett and my two boys when the subject of the movie The "A Team" came up. My wife became very animated and made the statement that she couldn't believe God could make such a beautiful man as Bradley Cooper. (The Hangover, Wedding Crashers) I'm not the overly jealous type and I know he's on the list. The list is the one that all married people have. You know, if you weren't married and you had the chance for a roll in the hay with this person you'd take it without forethought or regret, list. So I wasn't terribly surprised by her drooling proclamation of her admiration. But throwing God into it was a little unusual. I held my response to see if there was more. There certainly was.
She continued, "There is no way I could be married to someone that good looking. People would see us together and ask what I did to win him." Huh? Say what? It took less than two seconds for the sarcasm to spill forth. "What do they say when the see you with me? Where did you get him? Oh, Pet Rescue for Husbands. Did they tell you if nobody takes him home today he gets a bullet in the head tomorrow? I understand, he is sort of, well, you did a good thing." My kids have since dubbed me Pet Rescue as a result of this. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure these conversations take place all the time when the girls(or guys) get together for a couple of drinks. But not when your spouse is sitting within arms reach of you. That's just crazy.
Dirty Harry said it best when he declared, "A man's got to know his limitations". Long ago I embraced the large nose and large ears that extended away form my head. Throw in the voice that resembles hail on a tin roof and you've got quite a package. The fact that if I was ever chiseled into Mt. Rushmore most of Minnesota would be in perpetual shade hasn't bothered me much. Throughout my life I have always dated and married women who were better looking and better people than I am.(By dating I mean more than one night with no money changing hands) Given that fact I must have something going for me. Not Bradley Cooper mind you, but some sort of game. It still was a little shocking to hear where you are the totem pole so directly.
After things had calmed down and the requisite apologies were offered and accepted I had to ask the one question that remained, "Did that sound differently in your head before it came out of your mouth?" Scarlett started laughing and almost screamed, "Yes, I don't know what I was thinking." You know what, I have no trouble believing her. She knows her husband has a very good memory and has described my sarcastic wit with the term relentless. If she had thought her comments through she surely would have kept them to herself. Anyone who knows me I certainly have said things better left unsaid. I'm sure that I won't bring it up again. Rigghhhtt.
Till Next....
Looking at life through the odd mix of optimism, sarcasm, love and humor and not always in that order.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Why? Why not is a better question.
After spending a weekend in which my beloved Detroit Lions won a fourth straight road game for the first time since the year of my birth it occurred to me that maybe the times are a changing (thanks Bob). The biggest upset of the weekend didn't occur on the football field but in the arena of Presidential politics. Florida's straw poll came up with a winning candidate who was left for dead a long time ago. Not just politically, but literally as well. Herman Cain has overcome Stage 4 cancer after being given a 30% chance of survival. The man is someone who knows a fight when he is in one. And the one he is in now is a big one.
Barack has been in politics his entire adult life. The results speak for themselves. George Bush spent some time in the private sector but if your last name is Bush you have been in politics since before you were born. A Bush has been in American politics since the 1800's. Again the results speak for themselves. Bill Clinton was a politician his whole life and a good one at that. He had the ability to change course when the conditions suited him. But was he one of us working stiffs? Not one single day. That brings us back to another Bush. See above.
The reason for the historical comparison is an important one. I don't give a rat's ass if it's a Republican or a Democrat, our elected representatives have lost touch with who most of us are. They don't all start out that way but apparently Washington can do that to you. Could the reason be that they weren't one of us to start with? It would certainly seem so in the White House. It's time we really do put some hope in a change. Let's change the decades long habit of electing career politicians and elect someone who had lived life outside of school or government.
Circular logic being what it is we come back to Herman Cain. He grew up in the deep South when segregation was still in place. Mom was a maid and Dad was a barber, chauffeur and more. He holds degrees from Morehouse and Emory universities. The press loves to report on the Godfathers pizza job almost in a mocking tone. Try running a restaurant sometime. Let alone hundreds of them. He led the National Restaurant Association which proves his leadership abilities. During his military service he programmed missiles to hit their mark. Yes, that makes him a rocket scientist. His talk show here in Atlanta gave him the chance to speak with everyday people constantly. He doesn't need a focus group to find out what Americans want. He's been talking about it for years. His convictions are what they are. Poll numbers won't change them.
Did I mention the Detroit Lions won four road games in a row? Why Not?
Till next........
The cheering had barely stopped when the spinning began about how Cain won because voters wanted to "send a message" to Perry and Romney. And those were the Republican pundits. The Democrat talking heads said he's not a serious candidate. So did Bill O'Reilly(O'Reilly is Irish loosely translated into to pompous ass). Why? The better question to ask is, Why Not? His biggest drawback is he has never held elective office. Let us look at that.
Barack has been in politics his entire adult life. The results speak for themselves. George Bush spent some time in the private sector but if your last name is Bush you have been in politics since before you were born. A Bush has been in American politics since the 1800's. Again the results speak for themselves. Bill Clinton was a politician his whole life and a good one at that. He had the ability to change course when the conditions suited him. But was he one of us working stiffs? Not one single day. That brings us back to another Bush. See above.
The reason for the historical comparison is an important one. I don't give a rat's ass if it's a Republican or a Democrat, our elected representatives have lost touch with who most of us are. They don't all start out that way but apparently Washington can do that to you. Could the reason be that they weren't one of us to start with? It would certainly seem so in the White House. It's time we really do put some hope in a change. Let's change the decades long habit of electing career politicians and elect someone who had lived life outside of school or government.
Circular logic being what it is we come back to Herman Cain. He grew up in the deep South when segregation was still in place. Mom was a maid and Dad was a barber, chauffeur and more. He holds degrees from Morehouse and Emory universities. The press loves to report on the Godfathers pizza job almost in a mocking tone. Try running a restaurant sometime. Let alone hundreds of them. He led the National Restaurant Association which proves his leadership abilities. During his military service he programmed missiles to hit their mark. Yes, that makes him a rocket scientist. His talk show here in Atlanta gave him the chance to speak with everyday people constantly. He doesn't need a focus group to find out what Americans want. He's been talking about it for years. His convictions are what they are. Poll numbers won't change them.
Campaigning across the country he is building a following of dedicated voters. His powerful message and voice is truly inspirational. If you don't believe me, check out some of his speech's on YouTube. He's made mistakes so far but he is a quick study. The best lesson learned to date was telling his "handlers" to pound sand. Just be who you are and speak from the heart Herman. Tell us about your 9-9-9 plan in your words. Give us more about the fix for Social Security. Continue to be bold and the people will either vote for you or not. But it will be on your terms. We regular Johnny Lunch Bucket MFer's are begging for someone with common sense solutions to just tell us what they think and how they would act. And someone who will stick to what they say. So keeping shouting from the rooftops Herman because the people I talk to say they love your ideas but you can't get elected. Why?
Did I mention the Detroit Lions won four road games in a row? Why Not?
Till next........
Monday, August 29, 2011
Sunsets versus Sunrise?...Let's break it down.
Set aside for a minute that the sun does not actually rise or set. The Earth either rotates toward or away from the sun. Think of all the crappy poetry that would create if you had to substitute that definition for sunrise or sunset. Sorry for the redundancy of crappy poetry. Where was I? Oh, that was it. The difference between sunrises and sunsets and the people who embrace them is not a difference without a distinction.
Sunrises are beautiful in their own way. The way the sun reflects off the dew on the grass makes you squint. And the dew itself is pretty much a pain in the ass as well. You walk outside without shoes and you have to come in and change your socks. But the sounds of sunrise are my favorite part. The birds chirping away signifying the beginning of a new day. It would be their last day if I owned a shotgun. Folklore says they should be out getting a worm instead of performing an avian equivalent of Skynrd's Freebird outside my window. Just my luck I get birds who can't hold a job in my tree. But once a week I don't hear the birds at all.
Because every Tuesday is trash day. The birds know they cannot compete with the trash man. Our county has apparently contracted with the Gravedigger to haul our trash when he's not doing Monster Truck rallies. The windows actually shake when he rumbles up the street. If you have ever watched one of these trucks in action you need a life too. It is impossible for the trash to fall anywhere except in the back of the truck. Yet the driver will smash the dumpster a minimum of three times per can. It must be in his contract. I have been to skeet shooting competitions that create less noise. At least this is only once a week.
Sunrise also brings out the most mysterious creature I have ever met. The "morning person". These are people who wake up and immediately begin doing...well...stuff. They make coffee and and breakfast. Perhaps the strangest thing to me is they talk. A lot. And fast. It's like they have energy. And what do they have to look forward to? A nice long relaxing day at work. They have a to do list of things to accomplish during the day. I've had writing a to do list on the top of my to do list for the last twenty five years. I am not a morning person which makes them all the more confusing to me. Morning people truly embrace Carpe diem. I am more like carpe noonish. The thought of conversation with another human being before 9am is quite terrifying. My heart doesn't beat until close to noon. Sunrises are best when witnessed at the end of an all nighter. It usually is a sign of triumph at that point. To summarize the sunrise, you start out with wet feet, get audibly gang raped by birds and sanitation engineers and then are forced to engage in a conversation about what you plan to do for the day. Now for sunsets.
Shimmering waves of heat are still coming off the street as you pull into the driveway. You get into the house and emerge wearing nothing but a pair of shorts. Your feet feel the heat coming of the grass and it feels good. If you lay on the grass you could take a quick nap it's so comfortable. (Anyone who as had a few too many beers during the day knows this fact.) The afternoon breeze is kicking up right on time. The only sounds that can be heard is the sizzle of whatever type of beef is on the grill. At least until the ice cream truck makes his rounds in the neighborhood. Garbage versus ice cream, this isn't a fair fight.
Sunrise people begin to lose the stoned, eyes half shut look when the sun completely disappears. All of sudden the person who had the conversational skills of a mime for the daylight hours comes alive. Sunrise people will wax eloquent on anything from the merits of alabaster paint to Zeus being an overrated Greek God as long as the sun is gone for the day. They will complete an eight hour shift at work and then spend another hour in the parking lot talking to the same people they have been talking to all night. Vampires would be envious of the amount of work true sunset people can get done in the middle of the night.
What does the sunset bring? How about the anticipation of time with the family? Or sports or your favorite TV shows? Or maybe a little bumping uglies with your spouse? (Note: Even morning people don't like sex in the morning) It seems to me the real time to seize the day is when the day is about to end and the night begins. To summarize, the sunset brings on all that is true and good with the world. This comparison may be slightly biased.
Till next.....
Sunrises are beautiful in their own way. The way the sun reflects off the dew on the grass makes you squint. And the dew itself is pretty much a pain in the ass as well. You walk outside without shoes and you have to come in and change your socks. But the sounds of sunrise are my favorite part. The birds chirping away signifying the beginning of a new day. It would be their last day if I owned a shotgun. Folklore says they should be out getting a worm instead of performing an avian equivalent of Skynrd's Freebird outside my window. Just my luck I get birds who can't hold a job in my tree. But once a week I don't hear the birds at all.
Because every Tuesday is trash day. The birds know they cannot compete with the trash man. Our county has apparently contracted with the Gravedigger to haul our trash when he's not doing Monster Truck rallies. The windows actually shake when he rumbles up the street. If you have ever watched one of these trucks in action you need a life too. It is impossible for the trash to fall anywhere except in the back of the truck. Yet the driver will smash the dumpster a minimum of three times per can. It must be in his contract. I have been to skeet shooting competitions that create less noise. At least this is only once a week.
Sunrise also brings out the most mysterious creature I have ever met. The "morning person". These are people who wake up and immediately begin doing...well...stuff. They make coffee and and breakfast. Perhaps the strangest thing to me is they talk. A lot. And fast. It's like they have energy. And what do they have to look forward to? A nice long relaxing day at work. They have a to do list of things to accomplish during the day. I've had writing a to do list on the top of my to do list for the last twenty five years. I am not a morning person which makes them all the more confusing to me. Morning people truly embrace Carpe diem. I am more like carpe noonish. The thought of conversation with another human being before 9am is quite terrifying. My heart doesn't beat until close to noon. Sunrises are best when witnessed at the end of an all nighter. It usually is a sign of triumph at that point. To summarize the sunrise, you start out with wet feet, get audibly gang raped by birds and sanitation engineers and then are forced to engage in a conversation about what you plan to do for the day. Now for sunsets.
Shimmering waves of heat are still coming off the street as you pull into the driveway. You get into the house and emerge wearing nothing but a pair of shorts. Your feet feel the heat coming of the grass and it feels good. If you lay on the grass you could take a quick nap it's so comfortable. (Anyone who as had a few too many beers during the day knows this fact.) The afternoon breeze is kicking up right on time. The only sounds that can be heard is the sizzle of whatever type of beef is on the grill. At least until the ice cream truck makes his rounds in the neighborhood. Garbage versus ice cream, this isn't a fair fight.
Sunrise people begin to lose the stoned, eyes half shut look when the sun completely disappears. All of sudden the person who had the conversational skills of a mime for the daylight hours comes alive. Sunrise people will wax eloquent on anything from the merits of alabaster paint to Zeus being an overrated Greek God as long as the sun is gone for the day. They will complete an eight hour shift at work and then spend another hour in the parking lot talking to the same people they have been talking to all night. Vampires would be envious of the amount of work true sunset people can get done in the middle of the night.
What does the sunset bring? How about the anticipation of time with the family? Or sports or your favorite TV shows? Or maybe a little bumping uglies with your spouse? (Note: Even morning people don't like sex in the morning) It seems to me the real time to seize the day is when the day is about to end and the night begins. To summarize, the sunset brings on all that is true and good with the world. This comparison may be slightly biased.
Till next.....
Saturday, August 27, 2011
A real tragedy....Can you help?
I hesitated writing this blog because I have never wanted to ask anyone who reads it for anything except an open mind and a sense of humor. But this isn't about what I want. It's about a 16 year old girl named Emmie Brookins who lies in a bed at the Sheperd Spinal Center in Atlanta. It tells a sad and tragically true tale of how life can change in a couple of seconds.
Emmie just turned 16 earlier this year and by all accounts she is pretty typical. Even though she is small in stature she has the fighting spirit of a champion. She's going to need every bit of it. In the first week of July, Emmie and her friend went to a house two miles away for a little party. They got someone to use a fake I.D. and buy them some liquor. Just like I used to and I suspect a great many of you reading this as well. Kids just don't have the best judgement at times. They had arranged for someone else to drive them home but apparently changed their minds once the drinking started. Emmie took the passenger seat and her friend drove. They didn't go far.
The car left the road and hit a tree deploying the airbags. They were unable to determine if the collision or the airbag broke her neck. She was immediately paralyzed from the neck down. If her spine had been damaged one inch higher she would be dead or on a ventilator. As it was she was diagnosed a "complete" paralysis. When she arrived at the hospital they rushed her to surgery to install a screen to prevent a blood clot from doing further damage. Then they had one surgery to put a metal plate on the front of her neck. Then another surgery to put a plate on the back of her neck. Once she was stable enough she was driven by ambulance to Atlanta.
Miracles happen a lot at the Shepard Center and hopefully Emmie will be the latest one. She regained movement of both her arms. The hands and fingers have not progressed as much yet. She has some limited feeling in her legs and feet. These are very encouraging developments even though the doctors try to temper any excitement. She told her Mother that all she wants to do is something all by herself. Brush her own teeth, comb her own hair, go to the bathroom, anything. Not one day has past since I heard of the accident that I haven't tried to put myself in her parent's shoes. My mind just won't let me do it. It shuts down immediately. The thought of having to do that for one of my children or step children breaks my heart in a way I can't describe. Not when they are 16 years old. It just doesn't make any sense.
How do you ever not cry the minute your child leaves the house at night? Do you ever feel safe again? I don't know. I know that the medical bills were mostly covered by insurance. The other costs of a van to transport Emmie and a wheelchair is not. Making the house accessible to a wheelchair is not covered. Transportation to and from Atlanta for therapy will not be covered. These will quickly eliminate all the savings the family had. I am including the address and phone number on the bottom of the page for an account set up at Trustmark Bank for Emmie. If your heart calls you to donate than please do so.(No amount is too small) We all know how tough things are so if you can't donate or choose not to, please say a prayer for Emmie. If praying isn't your thing try and keep a positive thought toward her and her family. The last favor I ask of you is easy for everyone to do. Could you PLEASE share this on your Facebook page? The more people on her side the better the odds of a miracle.
When I first met Emmie four years ago I never knew she would become a step sister to my two boys. In blended family terms that means when the boy's Mother and I divorced she married Emmie's Father. Reality is slowly sinking into Christopher and Zachary concerning their step sister. At first they were mildly upset but didn't quite get the changes that were about to occur in her life. Every time they visit her at the Center it becomes harder for them. Hopefully God will give them, Emmie's parents and the rest of the family the strength they need. The fact that Emmie is still alive and fighting back tells me she has the strength she needs. Anything the rest of us can do would go a long way toward helping. Thank You in advance!!!
Shane and Kim Brookins c/o Emily Brookins
Trustmark Bank Lakeland Branch
3714 Canada Road
Lakeland, TN 901-377-3868
Any questions or concerns please ask for Nancy Harrell, Branch Manager
You can also follow Emmie's progress at http://www.carepages.com/ It's free to sign up. Also Facebook at prayforemmiebrookins. Sincerely, Thank you all again.
Till next.....
Emmie just turned 16 earlier this year and by all accounts she is pretty typical. Even though she is small in stature she has the fighting spirit of a champion. She's going to need every bit of it. In the first week of July, Emmie and her friend went to a house two miles away for a little party. They got someone to use a fake I.D. and buy them some liquor. Just like I used to and I suspect a great many of you reading this as well. Kids just don't have the best judgement at times. They had arranged for someone else to drive them home but apparently changed their minds once the drinking started. Emmie took the passenger seat and her friend drove. They didn't go far.
The car left the road and hit a tree deploying the airbags. They were unable to determine if the collision or the airbag broke her neck. She was immediately paralyzed from the neck down. If her spine had been damaged one inch higher she would be dead or on a ventilator. As it was she was diagnosed a "complete" paralysis. When she arrived at the hospital they rushed her to surgery to install a screen to prevent a blood clot from doing further damage. Then they had one surgery to put a metal plate on the front of her neck. Then another surgery to put a plate on the back of her neck. Once she was stable enough she was driven by ambulance to Atlanta.
Miracles happen a lot at the Shepard Center and hopefully Emmie will be the latest one. She regained movement of both her arms. The hands and fingers have not progressed as much yet. She has some limited feeling in her legs and feet. These are very encouraging developments even though the doctors try to temper any excitement. She told her Mother that all she wants to do is something all by herself. Brush her own teeth, comb her own hair, go to the bathroom, anything. Not one day has past since I heard of the accident that I haven't tried to put myself in her parent's shoes. My mind just won't let me do it. It shuts down immediately. The thought of having to do that for one of my children or step children breaks my heart in a way I can't describe. Not when they are 16 years old. It just doesn't make any sense.
How do you ever not cry the minute your child leaves the house at night? Do you ever feel safe again? I don't know. I know that the medical bills were mostly covered by insurance. The other costs of a van to transport Emmie and a wheelchair is not. Making the house accessible to a wheelchair is not covered. Transportation to and from Atlanta for therapy will not be covered. These will quickly eliminate all the savings the family had. I am including the address and phone number on the bottom of the page for an account set up at Trustmark Bank for Emmie. If your heart calls you to donate than please do so.(No amount is too small) We all know how tough things are so if you can't donate or choose not to, please say a prayer for Emmie. If praying isn't your thing try and keep a positive thought toward her and her family. The last favor I ask of you is easy for everyone to do. Could you PLEASE share this on your Facebook page? The more people on her side the better the odds of a miracle.
When I first met Emmie four years ago I never knew she would become a step sister to my two boys. In blended family terms that means when the boy's Mother and I divorced she married Emmie's Father. Reality is slowly sinking into Christopher and Zachary concerning their step sister. At first they were mildly upset but didn't quite get the changes that were about to occur in her life. Every time they visit her at the Center it becomes harder for them. Hopefully God will give them, Emmie's parents and the rest of the family the strength they need. The fact that Emmie is still alive and fighting back tells me she has the strength she needs. Anything the rest of us can do would go a long way toward helping. Thank You in advance!!!
Shane and Kim Brookins c/o Emily Brookins
Trustmark Bank Lakeland Branch
3714 Canada Road
Lakeland, TN 901-377-3868
Any questions or concerns please ask for Nancy Harrell, Branch Manager
You can also follow Emmie's progress at http://www.carepages.com/ It's free to sign up. Also Facebook at prayforemmiebrookins. Sincerely, Thank you all again.
Till next.....
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Confessions of an insomniac.......
For those who can roll into bed and blissfully fall to sleep, God bless you. The thought of actually sleeping a full eight hours is a radical concept to me. Most nights I get a solid three hours sleep and it suits me just fine. But when the real insomnia hits it's a bitch. Last week when I was nearing the completion of my novel it ramped up. Over the course of ten nights I crashed for eleven whole hours. Total. 66 minutes of sleep on average. When people hear this they actually say, "Boy could I get a lot done if I only slept that little". Let me address that for a minute.
It's Thanksgiving afternoon and dinner has been devoured. The Lions already lost by three touchdowns and the Cowboy game is about to start. Your pants are unbuttoned and you are prone on the couch and just before kickoff you feel yourself slipping into the inevitable tryptophan induced coma. But your eyes won't close. The neurotransmitters that are supposed to shut the brain down just go home early and don't quite finish the job. Every part of your body is so sleepy and groggy that just getting off the couch takes serious effort and forethought. Now imagine going through your day in that condition. Do you really think you would get anything done? Well that's what severe insomnia does for you. But there is good news.
Do you need to catch up on some reading? Plenty of time to wade through War and Peace. How about some television? With the addition of Netflix I'm on the third season of 24. Want to expand your sphere of knowledge? The internet is open all night long. I know more useless trivia than most Jeopardy contestants. Just ask me a question and I will set in motion boredom on steroids. What trees grow in Malaysia? That would be Mangrove and the Oil Palm. Along with over 8000 other plant species in the southeast rainforest. Last National Leaguer to win the triple Crown; Joe "Ducky" Medwick. Those are off the top of my head. The true benefit is if you are talking to someone you really would rather not be just start boring them to death. They will be looking at their watch and saying, "I got to run" before you even get to the eco-systems of the Amazon River. And when you're extremely tired it's even more fun than normal.
Even though I have found this more of a personality quirk than a true disease more research is being done on the effects of sleep deprivation. People who suffer from the type of insomnia I have generally die before they reach 40 years of age. That is a rather sobering number for a man of 49 to read. But until they come up with a real cure for it I will continue my duty as neighborhood night watchman. Not that it matters but it really isn't darkest before the dawn. It is darkest usually three hours before the sunrises. I've timed it. And you can count the stars in the sky. Anywhere from 238 to over 2300 depending on the conditions and location. The further in the country, the higher the count. Are you getting bored yet? They say you shouldn't eat right before bed. Whatever. I consume most of my calories between midnight and 4am. And I tip the scales at about 165 pounds.
The one thing that insomnia is really good for; late night blogging. Sleep well normal people. I'll have the light on for you when you wake up.
Till next.....
It's Thanksgiving afternoon and dinner has been devoured. The Lions already lost by three touchdowns and the Cowboy game is about to start. Your pants are unbuttoned and you are prone on the couch and just before kickoff you feel yourself slipping into the inevitable tryptophan induced coma. But your eyes won't close. The neurotransmitters that are supposed to shut the brain down just go home early and don't quite finish the job. Every part of your body is so sleepy and groggy that just getting off the couch takes serious effort and forethought. Now imagine going through your day in that condition. Do you really think you would get anything done? Well that's what severe insomnia does for you. But there is good news.
Do you need to catch up on some reading? Plenty of time to wade through War and Peace. How about some television? With the addition of Netflix I'm on the third season of 24. Want to expand your sphere of knowledge? The internet is open all night long. I know more useless trivia than most Jeopardy contestants. Just ask me a question and I will set in motion boredom on steroids. What trees grow in Malaysia? That would be Mangrove and the Oil Palm. Along with over 8000 other plant species in the southeast rainforest. Last National Leaguer to win the triple Crown; Joe "Ducky" Medwick. Those are off the top of my head. The true benefit is if you are talking to someone you really would rather not be just start boring them to death. They will be looking at their watch and saying, "I got to run" before you even get to the eco-systems of the Amazon River. And when you're extremely tired it's even more fun than normal.
Even though I have found this more of a personality quirk than a true disease more research is being done on the effects of sleep deprivation. People who suffer from the type of insomnia I have generally die before they reach 40 years of age. That is a rather sobering number for a man of 49 to read. But until they come up with a real cure for it I will continue my duty as neighborhood night watchman. Not that it matters but it really isn't darkest before the dawn. It is darkest usually three hours before the sunrises. I've timed it. And you can count the stars in the sky. Anywhere from 238 to over 2300 depending on the conditions and location. The further in the country, the higher the count. Are you getting bored yet? They say you shouldn't eat right before bed. Whatever. I consume most of my calories between midnight and 4am. And I tip the scales at about 165 pounds.
The one thing that insomnia is really good for; late night blogging. Sleep well normal people. I'll have the light on for you when you wake up.
Till next.....
It isn't over yet...
Today Rasmussen ran a poll that showed 15% of Americans think the country is on the right track. Said another way, 85% of those polled think we are screwed. With the Presidential election coming up next year the news and mudslinging will probably help drive that number even lower. The balance of power in the Congress is divided so any real legislation won't be passed any time soon either. Our economy has stalled and the real unemployment rate is close to 18%. Our national Debt is at a crisis level and both sides are committed to their ideology so much that they can't see the big picture. Sounds pretty bleak doesn't it?
Now for the good news; we have been in worse shape as a country before and not only came out of it but soared to new heights. Everyone knows about the 1929 Great Depression. How about the depression of 1920. It was far worse than 1929 and we came out of it in less than two years and went on to the "Roaring Twenties". Then there was the dark days of 1940 and 41 when the only thing standing between the world and a life of eating German food(I do not recommend ever eating German food) was the Brits and Winston Churchill. Until Japan lost their mind and decided to drag us kicking and screaming into WWII. After the war we again went on to prosperity and freedom that as been unequaled.
But the best example of our resolve was the Civil War. Over 600,000 of our own citizens died trying to right the wrong of slavery. (For those of you educated in the South, the war was about more than property rights) Families were torn apart. Brother fought agaisnt brother. That evil egotistical pyromaniac Sherman burnt most of the great city I now live in to the ground. And what happened when it was over? We once again rose to become the greatest nation in the world. History proves time and time again how resiliant we are as Americans.
What does happen if our economy and our way of life collapses? The next time their is an earthquake in Haiti will the Chinese be the first ones there to help? Or a tsunami wipes out Sri Lanka? Will the Russians be on the way there in 15 minutes like the U.S. Marines were? Earthquake in Japan? I guess France can send their military there to surrender. If it's not us, then who is it? We are the "shining city on the hill" that the world looks to. Sure, they run around and trash talk us but who do they call the minute a crisis happens? You, me and the rest of this great nation. We are the last best hope for freedom on the planet and I don't believe we are going to go down without a fight. We are still Americans one and all.
I wish Rasmussen would have asked a follow up question; Do you think America is still the greatest nation on Earth? That same 85 % that think we are screwed would have thought for just a minute before coming to the same thought I had. If we are not, than who is? I am still going to wave my flag proudly and beat my chest because I am an American. We have made mistakes but at least we try to fix them. Our system of government lets us voice our opinions and vote freely. We have freedom. We have the most generous, law abiding citizens in the world.
If we are not the greatest nation, then we really are screwed. We've been through tough times before so put a smile on your face and stay engaged. It isn't over yet.
Till next......
Now for the good news; we have been in worse shape as a country before and not only came out of it but soared to new heights. Everyone knows about the 1929 Great Depression. How about the depression of 1920. It was far worse than 1929 and we came out of it in less than two years and went on to the "Roaring Twenties". Then there was the dark days of 1940 and 41 when the only thing standing between the world and a life of eating German food(I do not recommend ever eating German food) was the Brits and Winston Churchill. Until Japan lost their mind and decided to drag us kicking and screaming into WWII. After the war we again went on to prosperity and freedom that as been unequaled.
But the best example of our resolve was the Civil War. Over 600,000 of our own citizens died trying to right the wrong of slavery. (For those of you educated in the South, the war was about more than property rights) Families were torn apart. Brother fought agaisnt brother. That evil egotistical pyromaniac Sherman burnt most of the great city I now live in to the ground. And what happened when it was over? We once again rose to become the greatest nation in the world. History proves time and time again how resiliant we are as Americans.
What does happen if our economy and our way of life collapses? The next time their is an earthquake in Haiti will the Chinese be the first ones there to help? Or a tsunami wipes out Sri Lanka? Will the Russians be on the way there in 15 minutes like the U.S. Marines were? Earthquake in Japan? I guess France can send their military there to surrender. If it's not us, then who is it? We are the "shining city on the hill" that the world looks to. Sure, they run around and trash talk us but who do they call the minute a crisis happens? You, me and the rest of this great nation. We are the last best hope for freedom on the planet and I don't believe we are going to go down without a fight. We are still Americans one and all.
I wish Rasmussen would have asked a follow up question; Do you think America is still the greatest nation on Earth? That same 85 % that think we are screwed would have thought for just a minute before coming to the same thought I had. If we are not, than who is? I am still going to wave my flag proudly and beat my chest because I am an American. We have made mistakes but at least we try to fix them. Our system of government lets us voice our opinions and vote freely. We have freedom. We have the most generous, law abiding citizens in the world.
If we are not the greatest nation, then we really are screwed. We've been through tough times before so put a smile on your face and stay engaged. It isn't over yet.
Till next......
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Stay sharp...It's so much easier
Doing my good deed for the day I mowed my neighbors lawn today. Unfortunately for me the blade on my mower is as dull as a three day insurance seminar. I ended up going back and forth over the same path several times all because my blade wasn't sharp and it occurred to me that it applies to much more than mowing the lawn. It really can be everywhere. Why do the older folks(Of which I am about to become) eat the early bird special at 4pm? Conventional wisdom is because they go to bed early. Not at all. It's because when you get older like me your teeth aren't as strong or as sharp. We just have to allow an extra hour to chew our food. It looks like Mr Ed with a really bad hangover. Lips are going in all different directions trying suck food out of places that weren't there before. It's not so much chewing food, it's more of a mashing process. Teeth have basically been replaced by mortar and pestles.
How about dull parenting? Is there a parent out there that has grown tired of telling the kids to do the same thing over and over again? If there is I haven't me them yet. Just about the time you are sure the imps are destined for a life of picking up trash on the side of a highway they succumb to your wishes. Are they all border line retarded? Not at all. Maybe the commands and requests are just dull. What if you put it in a way that makes them excited to do it? A way that gives them pride and ownership of wanting to do it right? What if you kept their senses sharp by switching up their chores or duties? Maybe they aren't the one's who are are a little slow? Is it possible that it could be us? Asking the same way every time and expecting a different result is insane. Once again, staying sharp is just easier.
Five or six days a week we trudge off to work to do basically the same thing everyday. How long does each day seem if it's dull? Longer than a baseball season. Do at least one small thing differently everyday and it's not so dull. It keeps you sharp which makes your day better and more valuable. Sometimes it's as easy as taking a different route to work. Or talking to a co-worker you don't usually talk to. Read a book at lunch instead of what you usually do. It doesn't matter what it is as long as it's different.
Dull is not a word that you want to be associated with. Sharp on the other hand; sharp dresser, sharp as a tack, sharp wit and so on. Dull on the other hand is just uninspiring. Dull colors, dull presentations, dull blog posts and so on. The next step after dull is blunt. Does anyone ever strive to be blunt? Even if you get clubbed to death they give you a boring autopsy, blunt force trauma. Who sets that for a goal. So stay sharp everybody. It keeps your mind fresh and gives you new things to look forward to. If you don't mind dull that's fine too. Maybe we can talk about it over dinner sometime? Say around 4pm at the local cafeteria?
Till next........
How about dull parenting? Is there a parent out there that has grown tired of telling the kids to do the same thing over and over again? If there is I haven't me them yet. Just about the time you are sure the imps are destined for a life of picking up trash on the side of a highway they succumb to your wishes. Are they all border line retarded? Not at all. Maybe the commands and requests are just dull. What if you put it in a way that makes them excited to do it? A way that gives them pride and ownership of wanting to do it right? What if you kept their senses sharp by switching up their chores or duties? Maybe they aren't the one's who are are a little slow? Is it possible that it could be us? Asking the same way every time and expecting a different result is insane. Once again, staying sharp is just easier.
Five or six days a week we trudge off to work to do basically the same thing everyday. How long does each day seem if it's dull? Longer than a baseball season. Do at least one small thing differently everyday and it's not so dull. It keeps you sharp which makes your day better and more valuable. Sometimes it's as easy as taking a different route to work. Or talking to a co-worker you don't usually talk to. Read a book at lunch instead of what you usually do. It doesn't matter what it is as long as it's different.
Dull is not a word that you want to be associated with. Sharp on the other hand; sharp dresser, sharp as a tack, sharp wit and so on. Dull on the other hand is just uninspiring. Dull colors, dull presentations, dull blog posts and so on. The next step after dull is blunt. Does anyone ever strive to be blunt? Even if you get clubbed to death they give you a boring autopsy, blunt force trauma. Who sets that for a goal. So stay sharp everybody. It keeps your mind fresh and gives you new things to look forward to. If you don't mind dull that's fine too. Maybe we can talk about it over dinner sometime? Say around 4pm at the local cafeteria?
Till next........
Friday, August 19, 2011
Get up in the morning, get on the bus.....
The Guess Who recorded those lyrics in a song titled Bus Rider sometime in the 1970's. Given the fact I was just a young child I never realized they were giving political advice. Sarah Palin, President Obama, John McCain and Hillary Clinton all have had grand bus tours across the country. Maybe I'm the odd duck here but riding a Greyhound doesn't inspire me. I'm not knocking traveling by bus but I don't really see the common man connection they are shooting for. How does riding a bus denote being in touch with the people of America?
Most of us at one time or another have taken a bus ride. The emphasis is on "one time". It's usually enough. My personal Greyhound experience was an eight hour trip. Of all the people I met and came in contact with not one of them made me think; there's a person who should be in charge of the country. Most of the people were obviously not in charge of soap. It did not seem to be a gathering of the best and brightest among us. (Myself included) So why do Republicans and Democrats put their tokens in the slot and hit the road? Could it be the plush seating that most of us associate with a bus? I believe Jimmy Hoffa is in fact encased in a seat cushion on a Greyhound bus in New Jersey somewhere. That material is tougher than concrete. You can recline almost a full 1/4 of an inch if you push back real hard to get some sleep. Or are they demonstrating their ability to endure pain like real Americans?
Perhaps it's just me but I prefer that people trying to run the country travel well. The thought of our President (or hopefuls) eating peanut butter crackers out of a vending machine and then deciding on an economic jobs plan seems crazy. Get a nice meal and come up with a smart plan. If you want to inspire confidence develop an energy plan, not take a field trip. Quit trying to be one of us and show that can you lead us. This is a bi-partisan act of stupidity that has seemed to increase over the years. The only reason people take a bus is because they can't afford to fly. Pretty safe to say that's probably not the case with politicians. If you're that broke your campaign has issues.
This is in no way meant to denigrate most Americans who take the bus. I have had to take a bus and not too many years ago I actually lived in my car. The BMW may be the ultimate driving machine but it sucks for sleeping. It will never be mistaken for a Select Comfort mattress. But I did it because I had no other choice at the time, not because I was trying to become a man of the homeless. One night after work a co-worker asked for a ride home because her car was being repaired. I gladly said I would but when we got in the car she turned and said, "Can we just go to your place?" I spread my arms wide and said,"You are in luck, here we are." That was the last time she asked me for a ride anywhere. Maybe she took the bus?
Till next.....
Most of us at one time or another have taken a bus ride. The emphasis is on "one time". It's usually enough. My personal Greyhound experience was an eight hour trip. Of all the people I met and came in contact with not one of them made me think; there's a person who should be in charge of the country. Most of the people were obviously not in charge of soap. It did not seem to be a gathering of the best and brightest among us. (Myself included) So why do Republicans and Democrats put their tokens in the slot and hit the road? Could it be the plush seating that most of us associate with a bus? I believe Jimmy Hoffa is in fact encased in a seat cushion on a Greyhound bus in New Jersey somewhere. That material is tougher than concrete. You can recline almost a full 1/4 of an inch if you push back real hard to get some sleep. Or are they demonstrating their ability to endure pain like real Americans?
Perhaps it's just me but I prefer that people trying to run the country travel well. The thought of our President (or hopefuls) eating peanut butter crackers out of a vending machine and then deciding on an economic jobs plan seems crazy. Get a nice meal and come up with a smart plan. If you want to inspire confidence develop an energy plan, not take a field trip. Quit trying to be one of us and show that can you lead us. This is a bi-partisan act of stupidity that has seemed to increase over the years. The only reason people take a bus is because they can't afford to fly. Pretty safe to say that's probably not the case with politicians. If you're that broke your campaign has issues.
This is in no way meant to denigrate most Americans who take the bus. I have had to take a bus and not too many years ago I actually lived in my car. The BMW may be the ultimate driving machine but it sucks for sleeping. It will never be mistaken for a Select Comfort mattress. But I did it because I had no other choice at the time, not because I was trying to become a man of the homeless. One night after work a co-worker asked for a ride home because her car was being repaired. I gladly said I would but when we got in the car she turned and said, "Can we just go to your place?" I spread my arms wide and said,"You are in luck, here we are." That was the last time she asked me for a ride anywhere. Maybe she took the bus?
Till next.....
Friday, April 29, 2011
Man Cave Musings: When all you can do isn't enough.......
Man Cave Musings: When all you can do isn't enough.......: "This past Wednesday was one of the most surreal, gut wrenching days I have spent in a very long time. Because I am a male and required to wa..."
When all you can do isn't enough.......
This past Wednesday was one of the most surreal, gut wrenching days I have spent in a very long time. Because I am a male and required to watch the weather at all times I knew what was coming toward us. Tornado's were on the way and it wasn't if they hit us but where and when. Then the reports started about Mississippi and then the poor people in Alabama. They all had plenty of time to prepare. The hardest hit had between 30 and 60 minutes to seek shelter.
And yet 300 people were killed by one of the worst twisters in history. That begs the question I posed earlier: What if you do all that you can do and it still isn't enough? What if you get to that room or basement and the whole house becomes a Frisbee? What if you leave the area to avoid the storm and drive right into a larger, more deadly one? What if you played by the rules, worked hard and made a life for yourself and it is all blown away before your eyes?
How many people in Japan woke up expecting to die in an earthquake or tsunami? In Haiti? The twin towers on 9/11? I'm guessing not one single person. And of the thousands of those people I would also guess some were very well prepared for anything they could think of. And still it wasn't enough to keep them safe or even alive. How much more could they have done?
Most likely the answer is nothing. Perhaps the only thing they could have done is the same thing all of us should do. Hug your spouse everyday and tell them how much you love them. Hug your kids the same way. Treat your friendships with care and don't take them for granted. Try and be helping influence on people you meet without being judgemental. Work to the best of your ability at everything you do. Try and make the world a better place when you leave than it was before you arrived. None of this will protect any of us but it does insure that when the time comes for you to go you will do so with very little regret.
In a perfect world we would all get a chance to say the things we want to say to the people we care about before they pass on. The world is not perfect in that way. We don't have that luxury very often. But before death grabs us we can make sure we have said all there is to say. Could anyone give a better gift to someone they care about than the peace of mind knowing they were loved? If there is one I haven't heard of it. The one thing Wednesday proved is the Boy Scouts had it right: Be Prepared.
Till next.....
Saturday, April 9, 2011
What a novel idea........
I have wanted to write a novel since I was twelve years old or so. One day a few months ago I decided it was time to go ahead and chase the dream. Every one of us has some sort of dream or goal that we wanted to do but life has a way of getting in the middle of things. Once the decision was made to write a book the only thing to do was to get started. And that proved to be the toughest part of the whole project. Telling a story inside my head was easy. Trying to type it out and make it coherent was a whole different matter. I would start and erase the entire thing and start over. Eventually I just decided to hell with it and started typing the tale.
A funny thing happened on the way to the end of the book. I began to get nervous at first and now I'm to the point of being scared. Scared of what I'm not sure. The novel was completed two days ago and I started reading it a final time before getting it to an editor. It's the first time I read what I wrote since I started and it shocked me. Try as I might I don't remember writing some of what I wrote. I know I did because I recognize my own stuff but I never thought I could write that well. Don't get me wrong here, I will never be mistaken for Earnest Hemmingway or even Dr. Seuss but I've read enough books to know this aint half bad. The reason it surprised me is this was just a dream I wanted to chase. I expected very little. I got much more. I can say I did something I always wanted to do. That makes it a success if it never does get pblished.
One added benefit for me is I can begin blogging again. I've really missed posting my ridiculous or sarcastic ideas everyday. There just wasn't enough time to write both. So if you missed the blog thanks for checking back in. There certainly is no shortage of things to laugh at in todays world.
Till next......
A funny thing happened on the way to the end of the book. I began to get nervous at first and now I'm to the point of being scared. Scared of what I'm not sure. The novel was completed two days ago and I started reading it a final time before getting it to an editor. It's the first time I read what I wrote since I started and it shocked me. Try as I might I don't remember writing some of what I wrote. I know I did because I recognize my own stuff but I never thought I could write that well. Don't get me wrong here, I will never be mistaken for Earnest Hemmingway or even Dr. Seuss but I've read enough books to know this aint half bad. The reason it surprised me is this was just a dream I wanted to chase. I expected very little. I got much more. I can say I did something I always wanted to do. That makes it a success if it never does get pblished.
One added benefit for me is I can begin blogging again. I've really missed posting my ridiculous or sarcastic ideas everyday. There just wasn't enough time to write both. So if you missed the blog thanks for checking back in. There certainly is no shortage of things to laugh at in todays world.
Till next......
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Isolate the gene and save the world....
From the boredom of men pontificating on the weather. It doesn't matter what type of man you are. If you are one of those fix anything, handyman types, you still have the gene. If you think a crescent wrench is made by Pillsbury, you still have the gene. In short, if you have a penis you are hard wired to have an opinion on the weather. Man's need for basic knowledge of cold and warm fronts knows no bounds. The amount of real knowledge is not important.
Ask any woman who has been in a relationship with a man if her beau watches the weather channel and you will always get a yes. Usually followed with a laugh and a "What's up with that?" Unless she is with one of those men that waits till she falls asleep. And then he creeps to the TV or computer and mutes the volume, almost like he's watching porn, and drinks in the world of high and low pressure, gulf moisture, Canadian clippers and tropical depressions. It is an obsession that is better brought into the light of day. All men have it, don't be ashamed.
My ever sarcastic bride can attest to my weather knowledge and need for current information. One night several months ago I was working on some computer stuff when I looked up and the weather channel was on. I left it on and when she turned on the TV there it was. One quick glance and I said, "That's a good looking map". While she was peeing on herself laughing so hard I went on to admire the clash of a low pressure system for Canada colliding with a weakening high pressure system over the Mid-Atlantic states with moisture form the Gulf of Mexico riding in to trigger thunderstorms. In short, a good looking map. Now I don't expect women to understand the unnatural desire to talk about the weather. But do not judge to harshly. Have you ever met a woman who couldn't spout on for 10 minutes on shoes? See my point?
It is merely a default mechanism for all male conversation. Any two men who find themselves in an uncomfortable situation always default to the weather. Stuck at a children's play with an ex-husband of your current wife? "Can you believe the rain last week?" It works. Pick any tight spot you may stumble into and the weather will bail you out. Stuck in a meeting and need to get out, "Cold front is on the way and once it starts raining that traffic is crazy. I better get going. It was Will Rogers who said, "Everyone talks about the weather but no one does anything about it." With apologies to the greatness of Will Rogers, we not only talk about it, we absolutely beat it to death. And we still don't do anything about it.
Till Next........
Ask any woman who has been in a relationship with a man if her beau watches the weather channel and you will always get a yes. Usually followed with a laugh and a "What's up with that?" Unless she is with one of those men that waits till she falls asleep. And then he creeps to the TV or computer and mutes the volume, almost like he's watching porn, and drinks in the world of high and low pressure, gulf moisture, Canadian clippers and tropical depressions. It is an obsession that is better brought into the light of day. All men have it, don't be ashamed.
My ever sarcastic bride can attest to my weather knowledge and need for current information. One night several months ago I was working on some computer stuff when I looked up and the weather channel was on. I left it on and when she turned on the TV there it was. One quick glance and I said, "That's a good looking map". While she was peeing on herself laughing so hard I went on to admire the clash of a low pressure system for Canada colliding with a weakening high pressure system over the Mid-Atlantic states with moisture form the Gulf of Mexico riding in to trigger thunderstorms. In short, a good looking map. Now I don't expect women to understand the unnatural desire to talk about the weather. But do not judge to harshly. Have you ever met a woman who couldn't spout on for 10 minutes on shoes? See my point?
It is merely a default mechanism for all male conversation. Any two men who find themselves in an uncomfortable situation always default to the weather. Stuck at a children's play with an ex-husband of your current wife? "Can you believe the rain last week?" It works. Pick any tight spot you may stumble into and the weather will bail you out. Stuck in a meeting and need to get out, "Cold front is on the way and once it starts raining that traffic is crazy. I better get going. It was Will Rogers who said, "Everyone talks about the weather but no one does anything about it." With apologies to the greatness of Will Rogers, we not only talk about it, we absolutely beat it to death. And we still don't do anything about it.
Till Next........
Saturday, March 12, 2011
I am a hypocrite.
After my last blog post about the massive debt we have incurred as a country the last decade and a half it was pointed out that I need to take care of my own house first. This was no passing shot across the bow. It came from a man who I have considered a friend for 25 years now. We have gone to probably fifty different sporting events together, ran half marathons and 10ks, played more rounds of golf than I can count and spent at least a dozen holidays together. He came to the hospital after my children were born. Friends like that don't come easy.
When my life began to fall apart 10 years ago he was kind enough to try and help me out. I swore I would pay him back when I could. Never in a million years did I think my life would continue swirling the drain but it did and it started moving faster. Over the next several years I lost a job, my family and the respect of most who knew me. I say this not for sympathy because I neither want or deserve any. Even though most of my problems had the best intentions, they were all self inflicted. I don't believe in being a victim and will not start now. I screwed my own life up and the good news is I can fix it. And some wonderful people are helping.
In a perfect world my friend would have been the first one to be paid. But the IRS has a way of making themselves a priority. They wanted their 30 thousand and were very good at strangling me till I came around to their way of thinking. But they are almost done now. And then I will go onto my friend. I don't blame him for getting pissed. It probably doesn't help that we disagree on almost everything when it comes to politics and I have been known to twist the sarcastic knife on occasion. But if someone owed me money (and many do) and were constantly harping on reducing our debt I would probably call them up and ask if they meant what they promised?
Most of the posts I write are either political or humorous in nature. Sometimes both. But the ones I post on debt are not cut on party lines. Both have saddled us with a debt that is approaching a level we will never pay back. And I know first hand what large debt can do. At this point in time debt has been a large part of my losing my kids, a marriage, a business and now it appears a 25 year friendship. It doesn't have to be that way for the country if we do something now. If not, as a country, we will go through the same pain. I don't recommend it.
Till next........
When my life began to fall apart 10 years ago he was kind enough to try and help me out. I swore I would pay him back when I could. Never in a million years did I think my life would continue swirling the drain but it did and it started moving faster. Over the next several years I lost a job, my family and the respect of most who knew me. I say this not for sympathy because I neither want or deserve any. Even though most of my problems had the best intentions, they were all self inflicted. I don't believe in being a victim and will not start now. I screwed my own life up and the good news is I can fix it. And some wonderful people are helping.
In a perfect world my friend would have been the first one to be paid. But the IRS has a way of making themselves a priority. They wanted their 30 thousand and were very good at strangling me till I came around to their way of thinking. But they are almost done now. And then I will go onto my friend. I don't blame him for getting pissed. It probably doesn't help that we disagree on almost everything when it comes to politics and I have been known to twist the sarcastic knife on occasion. But if someone owed me money (and many do) and were constantly harping on reducing our debt I would probably call them up and ask if they meant what they promised?
Most of the posts I write are either political or humorous in nature. Sometimes both. But the ones I post on debt are not cut on party lines. Both have saddled us with a debt that is approaching a level we will never pay back. And I know first hand what large debt can do. At this point in time debt has been a large part of my losing my kids, a marriage, a business and now it appears a 25 year friendship. It doesn't have to be that way for the country if we do something now. If not, as a country, we will go through the same pain. I don't recommend it.
Till next........
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Roses are red, violets are blue....
If it weren't such a serious crisis facing our country it would have been even funnier. How disconnected is Harry Reid? Our nation is so far in debt we are teetering on the brink of bankruptcy and Harry says the "mean-spirited" bill would mean the end of the Cowboy poetry festival. Let that sink in for just a moment. We are going to run out of Social Security money soon enough and Harry is worried about the prose of John Wayne wannabe's coming to Nevada.
Let's pass over the fact that an inanimate object cannot be mean spirited or happy or anything else. Glaring stupidity was on full display when Harry added,"Without our Cowboy Poetry Festival, the tens of thousands of people who come to northern Nevada every year would cease to exist." Are they cloning people at the festival? Or do they spontaneously combust if they don't get to hear a Haiku once a year? Do they commit suicide if no one spouts out a limmerick? I had no idea how vital the Cowboy Poetry Festival was to the existence of tens of thousands of people.
Can you imagine the pressure to find a word that rhymes with "orange sunset" knowing people will just cease to be if you can't figure one out? What is really frighteneing is that Harry was just re-elected to the Senate. How can you be that far remove from reality? We have 45 out of our 50 states are in the red with their budget. The defecit this year is 1.3 trillion and the democrats and Harry in particular don't think any cuts should be made. A measley 4 billion out of a 1.3 trillion dollar budget. At some point don't we have to be adults?
Cut spending is what 70% of the country wants. Will you have to raise taxes? Probably at some point but to do that now is just taking an alcoholic to a bar and telling him, "Watch my drink while I go to the bathroom" and then being surprised when it's gone when you get back. If we don't start having a serious conversation about entitlements we will all be attending Harry's beloved Cowboy Poetry Festival. Roses are red and violets are blue, I am screwed and so are you........
Till next.........
Let's pass over the fact that an inanimate object cannot be mean spirited or happy or anything else. Glaring stupidity was on full display when Harry added,"Without our Cowboy Poetry Festival, the tens of thousands of people who come to northern Nevada every year would cease to exist." Are they cloning people at the festival? Or do they spontaneously combust if they don't get to hear a Haiku once a year? Do they commit suicide if no one spouts out a limmerick? I had no idea how vital the Cowboy Poetry Festival was to the existence of tens of thousands of people.
Can you imagine the pressure to find a word that rhymes with "orange sunset" knowing people will just cease to be if you can't figure one out? What is really frighteneing is that Harry was just re-elected to the Senate. How can you be that far remove from reality? We have 45 out of our 50 states are in the red with their budget. The defecit this year is 1.3 trillion and the democrats and Harry in particular don't think any cuts should be made. A measley 4 billion out of a 1.3 trillion dollar budget. At some point don't we have to be adults?
Cut spending is what 70% of the country wants. Will you have to raise taxes? Probably at some point but to do that now is just taking an alcoholic to a bar and telling him, "Watch my drink while I go to the bathroom" and then being surprised when it's gone when you get back. If we don't start having a serious conversation about entitlements we will all be attending Harry's beloved Cowboy Poetry Festival. Roses are red and violets are blue, I am screwed and so are you........
Till next.........
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
The train went off the tracks.....
on this very day in history. It was March 9th, 1959 that the world as we knew it before was forever changed. Those of us who consider ourselves normal and in the parameters of the masses never saw the change coming. Now I was not around then but I do love history.
American women had previously been admired around the world for the hour glass figure that they had. Hollywood had no problems casting women who were above a size 2 and were not afraid of showing it. And then on this date came the Barbie Doll. Standing at 11 inches high she was so disproportionate that if she were life size she would fall over. Then all of sudden everyone thought women had to be skinny. You can put me in the camp of," teenage boys should look like teenage boys and women should look like women." Barbie gave birth to a whole generation of Twiggy type models who look like they need a cheeseburger. Kate Moss and others have followed.
What makes it even more interesting is Barbie also spurred a generation of feminists. They would shout from the mountain top that Barbie was what was wrong with America. She symbolized women as objects and not smart, capable people. I don't know about all that. I think they just needed something to be angry about. The unemployed lumberjack look is less sexy than Twiggy. Some of those folks could use a little bit of objectifying.
Thankfully a woman like JLO appeared on the scene and the world is returning to sanity. The hour glass figure is again taking it's rightful place in society. Women should be proud of all the assets they have. I like a balcony you can do Shakespeare from as much as the next guy but don't try and put it on a lamp post. Then it looks almost freakish unless it's winding around a stripper pole. So let's all raise a toast to Barbie for starting this merry-go-round. Here's to you girl, bottoms up!
Till next.......
American women had previously been admired around the world for the hour glass figure that they had. Hollywood had no problems casting women who were above a size 2 and were not afraid of showing it. And then on this date came the Barbie Doll. Standing at 11 inches high she was so disproportionate that if she were life size she would fall over. Then all of sudden everyone thought women had to be skinny. You can put me in the camp of," teenage boys should look like teenage boys and women should look like women." Barbie gave birth to a whole generation of Twiggy type models who look like they need a cheeseburger. Kate Moss and others have followed.
What makes it even more interesting is Barbie also spurred a generation of feminists. They would shout from the mountain top that Barbie was what was wrong with America. She symbolized women as objects and not smart, capable people. I don't know about all that. I think they just needed something to be angry about. The unemployed lumberjack look is less sexy than Twiggy. Some of those folks could use a little bit of objectifying.
Thankfully a woman like JLO appeared on the scene and the world is returning to sanity. The hour glass figure is again taking it's rightful place in society. Women should be proud of all the assets they have. I like a balcony you can do Shakespeare from as much as the next guy but don't try and put it on a lamp post. Then it looks almost freakish unless it's winding around a stripper pole. So let's all raise a toast to Barbie for starting this merry-go-round. Here's to you girl, bottoms up!
Till next.......
Monday, March 7, 2011
Don't you love the games you played as a kid?
Some of my fondest childhood memories surround being outside playing the games kids play. My favorites were hide and seek, kick the can and monopoly if we stayed inside. The sheer joy of having nothing to worry about except your own satisfaction. The freedom from all the responsibility that comes with being an adult hadn't even entered into my mind. We didn't have to worry about doing our job or planning for the future or even if we had enough to pay the bills.
How was I to know that if I had chosen a career in politics I could have kept playing all those games and kept those juvenile attitudes. If I ran for the senate in Wisconsin I could still be playing hide and seek outside of Chicago someplace. They aren't worried about adult things like doing their job or acting responsible. Not a care in the world at their "undisclosed location". Just like I was when I was a kid they will stay and play until the demand for them to come home gets too much to bear. But for now, allie allie in come free boys.
Then there is kick the can. I could have been a US senator or congressman the last 20 years and kept playing this one. Just give it a good kick and run away before you get caught. No need to worry about the future because once you kicked it away, it was somebodys turn, just not yours anymore. The future was only determined by how far you could get away from it. That is exactly what our representatives have been doing for 20 years. That's when the warning bells started about social security and Medicare and Medicaid first sounded. And what have they done about it. Kick it as far as you can. Now it's not your responsibility anymore. Just kick it down the road like you were a kid and head into the capitol and see if you can have ice cream.
Nobody could forget playing monopoly either. Fire in the fireplace because it's cold outside and all of a sudden you have the world of finance at your fingertips. You buy and sell property with money that has no real value. If it gets late in the game you have to re-shuffle the money or the game stalled. There wasn't enough money to finish the game. Damn, I could have been a chairman in the Federal Reserve. They have no problem printing more money to keep the game going. And sometime very soon our dollar will be worth the same as a monopoly $500 bill. Do what you can to keep the game going. When massive inflation hits we will just print more. We're talking Park Place and Boardwalk here baby. Don't stop now. We'll figure it out later.
I'd rather not go into playing doctor when I got a little older as training for the TSA. But what a shame it is that people we have entrusted to represent us have chosen to play kids games. Senators shirking their adult responsibility to vote for the people who elected them. Instead they hide like a spoiled child waiting for Dad to get home. It's pathetic. Representatives from both parties continue to ignore what everyone knows is a system going broke fast. And they act like kids blaming other kids so no one actually takes the blame. Pathetic again. And now Mr. Ben decides to buy our own bonds which is just another way of printing more money. If you have a lot more of something, is it more or less valuable? Obviously less but if we stop now we might feel pain. You know, like adults do when they are trying to balance the household budget. Or when they are trying to save for their kids to go to college.
How screwed up is everything if our kids are more responsible than we are? The answer is it's pretty screwed up and if we elect adults who tell the truth we might get out of it. Or we can continue to elect people who lie and demagogue every issue rather than deal with it. The choice is in our hands. Whatever we decide, can we have ice cream after we vote?
Till next.......
How was I to know that if I had chosen a career in politics I could have kept playing all those games and kept those juvenile attitudes. If I ran for the senate in Wisconsin I could still be playing hide and seek outside of Chicago someplace. They aren't worried about adult things like doing their job or acting responsible. Not a care in the world at their "undisclosed location". Just like I was when I was a kid they will stay and play until the demand for them to come home gets too much to bear. But for now, allie allie in come free boys.
Then there is kick the can. I could have been a US senator or congressman the last 20 years and kept playing this one. Just give it a good kick and run away before you get caught. No need to worry about the future because once you kicked it away, it was somebodys turn, just not yours anymore. The future was only determined by how far you could get away from it. That is exactly what our representatives have been doing for 20 years. That's when the warning bells started about social security and Medicare and Medicaid first sounded. And what have they done about it. Kick it as far as you can. Now it's not your responsibility anymore. Just kick it down the road like you were a kid and head into the capitol and see if you can have ice cream.
Nobody could forget playing monopoly either. Fire in the fireplace because it's cold outside and all of a sudden you have the world of finance at your fingertips. You buy and sell property with money that has no real value. If it gets late in the game you have to re-shuffle the money or the game stalled. There wasn't enough money to finish the game. Damn, I could have been a chairman in the Federal Reserve. They have no problem printing more money to keep the game going. And sometime very soon our dollar will be worth the same as a monopoly $500 bill. Do what you can to keep the game going. When massive inflation hits we will just print more. We're talking Park Place and Boardwalk here baby. Don't stop now. We'll figure it out later.
I'd rather not go into playing doctor when I got a little older as training for the TSA. But what a shame it is that people we have entrusted to represent us have chosen to play kids games. Senators shirking their adult responsibility to vote for the people who elected them. Instead they hide like a spoiled child waiting for Dad to get home. It's pathetic. Representatives from both parties continue to ignore what everyone knows is a system going broke fast. And they act like kids blaming other kids so no one actually takes the blame. Pathetic again. And now Mr. Ben decides to buy our own bonds which is just another way of printing more money. If you have a lot more of something, is it more or less valuable? Obviously less but if we stop now we might feel pain. You know, like adults do when they are trying to balance the household budget. Or when they are trying to save for their kids to go to college.
How screwed up is everything if our kids are more responsible than we are? The answer is it's pretty screwed up and if we elect adults who tell the truth we might get out of it. Or we can continue to elect people who lie and demagogue every issue rather than deal with it. The choice is in our hands. Whatever we decide, can we have ice cream after we vote?
Till next.......
It would be nice if they cared......
Gas prices are going to $4.00 a gallon shortly. There is no question that at that level our economy starts to slowly grind to a halt. The last time oil and gas were at these levels the wailing and gnashing of teeth could be heard from Washington at all hours of the night. I remember when it was all because President Bush was in bed with oil companies. Yet after hurricane Katrina Bush released some of our oil reserves to try and help the average citizen.
Has anyone suggested that President Obama is getting rich from oil companies? Or that he should do something? How about letting our own oil companies go back to work? So far one permit has been granted to drill in the Gulf of Mexico. For now I will ignore the fact that his moratorium on drilling was ruled unconstitutional by a federal judge because that's what his administration does to federal rulings anyway. No, we know he is not getting rich from the oil companies. But that's not the dirty secret here. They don't care. They might even be happy.
In 2009 Obama said he was "comfortable" with $4 a gallon gas he just wished it went up slower. Well isn't that an easy point of view if you don't ever pay for gas? He probably hasn't paid for a gallon of gas since he was at Harvard. For those of us in the real world who have to balance a family budget it matters a great deal. In the dream world of high speed rail and universal health care and mediocrity I'm sure expensive gas works well. In reality, it taxes every American. When Senator Obama began campaigning he said under his energy plan "prices would necessarily skyrocket". His words not mine.
Green energy sounds like a great idea in a classroom or a wine and cheese party in San Fransisco but in the real world we are not ready to switch. We have more natural gas than the rest of the world yet we don't want to switch all our federal vehicles to run on it. Why? We have had a Department of Energy for how many years and billions of dollars worth of our money? About 40 years and we are in the trillions and what has changed? Your tax dollars at work. But this isn't incompetence, it is celebreated. The only reason you won't see a public display of satisfaction from President Obama is that 2012 is right around the corner.
So, much like Kevin Bacon's character in Animal House "Stay calm, all is well."
Till next.....
Has anyone suggested that President Obama is getting rich from oil companies? Or that he should do something? How about letting our own oil companies go back to work? So far one permit has been granted to drill in the Gulf of Mexico. For now I will ignore the fact that his moratorium on drilling was ruled unconstitutional by a federal judge because that's what his administration does to federal rulings anyway. No, we know he is not getting rich from the oil companies. But that's not the dirty secret here. They don't care. They might even be happy.
In 2009 Obama said he was "comfortable" with $4 a gallon gas he just wished it went up slower. Well isn't that an easy point of view if you don't ever pay for gas? He probably hasn't paid for a gallon of gas since he was at Harvard. For those of us in the real world who have to balance a family budget it matters a great deal. In the dream world of high speed rail and universal health care and mediocrity I'm sure expensive gas works well. In reality, it taxes every American. When Senator Obama began campaigning he said under his energy plan "prices would necessarily skyrocket". His words not mine.
Green energy sounds like a great idea in a classroom or a wine and cheese party in San Fransisco but in the real world we are not ready to switch. We have more natural gas than the rest of the world yet we don't want to switch all our federal vehicles to run on it. Why? We have had a Department of Energy for how many years and billions of dollars worth of our money? About 40 years and we are in the trillions and what has changed? Your tax dollars at work. But this isn't incompetence, it is celebreated. The only reason you won't see a public display of satisfaction from President Obama is that 2012 is right around the corner.
So, much like Kevin Bacon's character in Animal House "Stay calm, all is well."
Till next.....
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Anatomy of a long term freindship.
We have known each other all of our lives. He had a tough start to life and his appearance was changed forever where as I had the "Leave it to Beaver" childhood. It never mattered to either of us from the start. We just liked each other's company.
Early on when we were just past toddlers we would hang out together without a care in the world. Nothing to worry about except what was for dinner. It was the way it's supposed to be at that age. Even though we were together all the time neither one of us felt the need to have the upper hand. Like most long term relationships that changed and sometimes not for the better.
When we reached high school age, he became much more confident and independent than I was. He would jump up whenever he wanted to and I would cringe and just want him to sit down. Timing never seemed to be a concern to him. It seemed to be all I ever thought of. When we would get out of school I would try to beat the rebel streak out of him but it never worked. It seemed to only make him more independent than before. It was a very awkward time for me and I suspect it was tough on him as well. But the only thing constant is change.
The day girls and later women began to hold a certain appeal to both of us our relationship changed once again. We both tried our best to impress the ladies. I wouldn't use the word jealousy to describe our differences as much as I would say it led to differences of opinion. And then when you add alcohol all hell would break loose. We would have heated discussions over girls many times. Sometimes he would win, sometimes I would. But it was always interesting.
Fast forward a decade or so and our friendship still remained. We would get together and play whatever a couple of times a week and I would always beat the crap out of him. Sometimes I would wonder why he didn't just give up because we both knew the outcome but he probably enjoyed playing anyway. He has never lost his spirit, even to this day. We still hang out together but the only time we play anymore is if my wife wants to join us. He has learned to not even feign interest unless she is around because he still thinks I'll want to play and beat him up again.
Yes, the long term relationship a man has with his penis, Johnson or member is a complicated one. One is supposed to think while the other is supposed to do what feels good. Amazingly, we men seemed to get confused on which is which from time to time. Some men actually name their penis. That may be taking the relationship a bit to far. What next? Flowers for Valentines Day? No, we need to remember who is supposed to be in charge. Even though it gets hard to tell sometimes.
Till next.......
Early on when we were just past toddlers we would hang out together without a care in the world. Nothing to worry about except what was for dinner. It was the way it's supposed to be at that age. Even though we were together all the time neither one of us felt the need to have the upper hand. Like most long term relationships that changed and sometimes not for the better.
When we reached high school age, he became much more confident and independent than I was. He would jump up whenever he wanted to and I would cringe and just want him to sit down. Timing never seemed to be a concern to him. It seemed to be all I ever thought of. When we would get out of school I would try to beat the rebel streak out of him but it never worked. It seemed to only make him more independent than before. It was a very awkward time for me and I suspect it was tough on him as well. But the only thing constant is change.
The day girls and later women began to hold a certain appeal to both of us our relationship changed once again. We both tried our best to impress the ladies. I wouldn't use the word jealousy to describe our differences as much as I would say it led to differences of opinion. And then when you add alcohol all hell would break loose. We would have heated discussions over girls many times. Sometimes he would win, sometimes I would. But it was always interesting.
Fast forward a decade or so and our friendship still remained. We would get together and play whatever a couple of times a week and I would always beat the crap out of him. Sometimes I would wonder why he didn't just give up because we both knew the outcome but he probably enjoyed playing anyway. He has never lost his spirit, even to this day. We still hang out together but the only time we play anymore is if my wife wants to join us. He has learned to not even feign interest unless she is around because he still thinks I'll want to play and beat him up again.
Yes, the long term relationship a man has with his penis, Johnson or member is a complicated one. One is supposed to think while the other is supposed to do what feels good. Amazingly, we men seemed to get confused on which is which from time to time. Some men actually name their penis. That may be taking the relationship a bit to far. What next? Flowers for Valentines Day? No, we need to remember who is supposed to be in charge. Even though it gets hard to tell sometimes.
Till next.......
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
He's just not that into you.....
I know you think he was great during the courtship phase of your relationship. He said all the right things, told funny jokes, paid attention to your family and friends and always seemed deeply concerned about your feelings. Then when he won your heart the phone calls stopped coming. The goodies you were promised never did arrive. He seemed aloof and distant. He certainly didn't care about your feelings the way he used.
We all have the same reaction when a relationship is going badly. First we question if it was ever real in the first place. Then we wonder what we did to sabotage or destroy it. Then we get angry. And I mean really pissed off. Because we feel lied to and cheated on. We know the attention and love we used to get is going to someone else. The fact of the matter is that he really was never that into.
Not your boyfriend or girlfriend, your elected representatives. And not just in Wisconsin and Indiana where they are playing hide and seek with their own jobs. But all over this great nation the liberals, who will soon be faced with voting for you the American people, or the people who scrape the dues from the paychecks of hard working civil servants, only to donate to corrupt politicians who vote for bigger pay packages that eventually bankrupt you and the country. And they will not choose you. They really weren't that into you to begin with.
For those independents and moderates you can add the President to the list. He sounded good two and a half years ago and then he changed. You said you didn't want health care or more government spending. He didn't care. He still doesn't. All you were was the equivalent of a late night booty call by someone who forgot your name by the morning. Don't be too sad. We've all been used at one time or another. It just hurts more when you have to see them everyday.
So grab a pint of ice cream and a box of tissues. The hurt will go away right around November 2012. Till then just try not too take it personal. They just were never really into us.
Till next.....
We all have the same reaction when a relationship is going badly. First we question if it was ever real in the first place. Then we wonder what we did to sabotage or destroy it. Then we get angry. And I mean really pissed off. Because we feel lied to and cheated on. We know the attention and love we used to get is going to someone else. The fact of the matter is that he really was never that into.
Not your boyfriend or girlfriend, your elected representatives. And not just in Wisconsin and Indiana where they are playing hide and seek with their own jobs. But all over this great nation the liberals, who will soon be faced with voting for you the American people, or the people who scrape the dues from the paychecks of hard working civil servants, only to donate to corrupt politicians who vote for bigger pay packages that eventually bankrupt you and the country. And they will not choose you. They really weren't that into you to begin with.
For those independents and moderates you can add the President to the list. He sounded good two and a half years ago and then he changed. You said you didn't want health care or more government spending. He didn't care. He still doesn't. All you were was the equivalent of a late night booty call by someone who forgot your name by the morning. Don't be too sad. We've all been used at one time or another. It just hurts more when you have to see them everyday.
So grab a pint of ice cream and a box of tissues. The hurt will go away right around November 2012. Till then just try not too take it personal. They just were never really into us.
Till next.....
Monday, February 21, 2011
Shinedown had it right. What a shame......
Charlie Sheen is not drawing a lot of sympathy right now. He is really going to need it later on. That is if he decides to give being sober a shot. If he doesn't he has two options remaining, insanity or early death. You can write it down and remind me later. It is one of the three.
The lyrics from the song say, "What a shame what a shame to judge a life that you can't change." And it's 100% correct. Only Charlie has a chance to change. But the people who say that he is a spoiled brat with no willpower really don't understand how sick he is. Drunks don't lack willpower. I am one so I should know. How many people who say that could drink all night and then mix a screwdriver the first thing in the morning and drink it through a straw because their hands are shaking too much to hold it? Not a damn one of them. Is that a lack of willpower? No. A lack of judgement for sure, but that takes some stones.
What Charlie hasn't figured out yet is the group with the initials he ranted about has saved millions of people just like him. Just because he is on a yacht and someone else is under a bridge is just a matter of location. They will both end up in the same place if they don't get help. With all the people willing to suck up to Charlie and cover for him it might take longer. It might not. If anyone is old enough to remember Jim Morrison or John Belushi they know.
I am not suggesting that he be held up as some type of martyr either. He will have to answer for his own actions one day. I actually saw some people say they "liked" him. I wonder if that was when he was choking the mother of his children. Or when he beat up the hooker and locked her in a closet? How do you like someone who does that? Or when all his co-workers lost their jobs because he couldn't do his? There sure is a lot to "like" about a man like that.
Judging him is not my intent. Some of the stunts I pulled when I was drinking are still a source of anguish to me twenty five years later. I've tried to make amends where possible but you still never forget what you were like. And it serves as a damn good reminder of why you never want to go back. So hard as it may be, if you're Christian, say a prayer for Charlie. If not hope he gets some help. Because without he adds to the list of promising young people who never did figure out that one day at a time thing really does work. If you work it.
Till next.......
The lyrics from the song say, "What a shame what a shame to judge a life that you can't change." And it's 100% correct. Only Charlie has a chance to change. But the people who say that he is a spoiled brat with no willpower really don't understand how sick he is. Drunks don't lack willpower. I am one so I should know. How many people who say that could drink all night and then mix a screwdriver the first thing in the morning and drink it through a straw because their hands are shaking too much to hold it? Not a damn one of them. Is that a lack of willpower? No. A lack of judgement for sure, but that takes some stones.
What Charlie hasn't figured out yet is the group with the initials he ranted about has saved millions of people just like him. Just because he is on a yacht and someone else is under a bridge is just a matter of location. They will both end up in the same place if they don't get help. With all the people willing to suck up to Charlie and cover for him it might take longer. It might not. If anyone is old enough to remember Jim Morrison or John Belushi they know.
I am not suggesting that he be held up as some type of martyr either. He will have to answer for his own actions one day. I actually saw some people say they "liked" him. I wonder if that was when he was choking the mother of his children. Or when he beat up the hooker and locked her in a closet? How do you like someone who does that? Or when all his co-workers lost their jobs because he couldn't do his? There sure is a lot to "like" about a man like that.
Judging him is not my intent. Some of the stunts I pulled when I was drinking are still a source of anguish to me twenty five years later. I've tried to make amends where possible but you still never forget what you were like. And it serves as a damn good reminder of why you never want to go back. So hard as it may be, if you're Christian, say a prayer for Charlie. If not hope he gets some help. Because without he adds to the list of promising young people who never did figure out that one day at a time thing really does work. If you work it.
Till next.......
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Go ahead......We can take it.
Interesting how the weasels in Congress have so much faith in us before the elections and so little afterward. Everyone except the very far left will admit that our country is broke. And with interest, getting broker by the minute. Yet here comes our budget from the White House this week and surprise, surprise, we are going to spend more money than we have and taxes are going up. Despite the words coming out of the President's mouth the numbers don't lie.
So here's the big question, why don't they think we can handle the truth? Is it focus groups that tell them that Americans will never stand to reform Medicare, Medicaid and Social Security? Is it the demonstrations in Wisconsin because the Governor wants to actually, gasp, require teachers to pay for 12% of the health care they get? Or is it the polls that show 62% of Americans favor cutting entitlements just not theirs? Could be anyone of the above. Except the problem is all of them are wrong. We can take tightening our belt to help fix the mess we're in.
What rational thinking American, who didn't already depend on Social Security, would not want to hear some sort of common sense solutions to the financial problems we face? We all know that what we have is going to crumble. The exact timing of the meltdown seems to vary between which party is in power and which party needs the senior vote more. All we keep hearing is that these are the third rail of politics. I think the Tea Party candidates that were elected proved that the country can take the truth. As a matter of fact, we really want to hear it.
You can defense spending to the list. Most of conservatives will admit as well that our defense budget has to be cut. And maybe we can even talk about the fraud and corruption. On September 10, 2001 Don Rumsfeld said the pentagon was missing 250 million dollars. Missing. And he said that was just the start of his findings. Then the next day happened and all was forgotten. All of these need to be cut and or changed to make sure they will exist at all in the future. So why won't a politician from any party start talking about it earnestly?
The answer is a simple one. Fear. They want to keep the power they have. And they know whoever speaks first on these issues will be vilified by the other party and the press and who knows who else. But things have changed. They are wrong about what the people will do. The people would re-elect any politician who would honestly try to cut spending and balance our budget. Without it we are doomed. We have 14 trillion dollars we owe and were just told we need to spend more on new energy and a high speed train. Are you kidding me? How stupid do they think we are? We have to pay bills. We don't buy new train sets for the kids in we can't pay the rent. Our Treasury Secretary told Congress the budget he submitted was unsustainable. Then why submit it? Go back and fix it like you did your tax returns.
So come on Washington, we're all adults here. Talk to us and somebody starting leading. We will follow if you show us how. You were elected to lead so quit whining and do your job. We can take it.
Till next......
So here's the big question, why don't they think we can handle the truth? Is it focus groups that tell them that Americans will never stand to reform Medicare, Medicaid and Social Security? Is it the demonstrations in Wisconsin because the Governor wants to actually, gasp, require teachers to pay for 12% of the health care they get? Or is it the polls that show 62% of Americans favor cutting entitlements just not theirs? Could be anyone of the above. Except the problem is all of them are wrong. We can take tightening our belt to help fix the mess we're in.
What rational thinking American, who didn't already depend on Social Security, would not want to hear some sort of common sense solutions to the financial problems we face? We all know that what we have is going to crumble. The exact timing of the meltdown seems to vary between which party is in power and which party needs the senior vote more. All we keep hearing is that these are the third rail of politics. I think the Tea Party candidates that were elected proved that the country can take the truth. As a matter of fact, we really want to hear it.
You can defense spending to the list. Most of conservatives will admit as well that our defense budget has to be cut. And maybe we can even talk about the fraud and corruption. On September 10, 2001 Don Rumsfeld said the pentagon was missing 250 million dollars. Missing. And he said that was just the start of his findings. Then the next day happened and all was forgotten. All of these need to be cut and or changed to make sure they will exist at all in the future. So why won't a politician from any party start talking about it earnestly?
The answer is a simple one. Fear. They want to keep the power they have. And they know whoever speaks first on these issues will be vilified by the other party and the press and who knows who else. But things have changed. They are wrong about what the people will do. The people would re-elect any politician who would honestly try to cut spending and balance our budget. Without it we are doomed. We have 14 trillion dollars we owe and were just told we need to spend more on new energy and a high speed train. Are you kidding me? How stupid do they think we are? We have to pay bills. We don't buy new train sets for the kids in we can't pay the rent. Our Treasury Secretary told Congress the budget he submitted was unsustainable. Then why submit it? Go back and fix it like you did your tax returns.
So come on Washington, we're all adults here. Talk to us and somebody starting leading. We will follow if you show us how. You were elected to lead so quit whining and do your job. We can take it.
Till next......
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
10 signs you're at a great Super Bowl Party (Man Cave style)
10. At least one fan shows up in a complete uniform including cleats and a converted beer helmet.
9. There are three kegs of beer. Bud, Bud light and something imported.
8. The carcass of the cow that was carved up for pre-game steaks is still in the backyard.
7. Someone shows up wearing paint on their face.
6. The only sound during the game is either cheering or cursing. Commercials are fast forwarded through after beers have been refilled.
5. The only woman there is an ex Dallas Cowboys cheerleader turned stripper named Bambi.
4. There is a slight delay to watch the start of the 3rd quarter while the stripper pole is removed from the living room.
3. During a commercial break a fan is injured while trying to replicate a pole dance like Bamabi. The upside down one-legged slide proves too difficult for his 300 pound frame.
2. The only reference to "sex in the city" is a tale of a drunken night in Jaurez Mexico. A donkey maybe included in the story.
1. The game goes into triple overtime and is won on a statue of liberty play that goes 96 yards.
Just remember men, this is not the end of an era, it's the begining of baseball season. Pitchers and catchers report tomorrow. Play Ball.....
Till Next.....
9. There are three kegs of beer. Bud, Bud light and something imported.
8. The carcass of the cow that was carved up for pre-game steaks is still in the backyard.
7. Someone shows up wearing paint on their face.
6. The only sound during the game is either cheering or cursing. Commercials are fast forwarded through after beers have been refilled.
5. The only woman there is an ex Dallas Cowboys cheerleader turned stripper named Bambi.
4. There is a slight delay to watch the start of the 3rd quarter while the stripper pole is removed from the living room.
3. During a commercial break a fan is injured while trying to replicate a pole dance like Bamabi. The upside down one-legged slide proves too difficult for his 300 pound frame.
2. The only reference to "sex in the city" is a tale of a drunken night in Jaurez Mexico. A donkey maybe included in the story.
1. The game goes into triple overtime and is won on a statue of liberty play that goes 96 yards.
Just remember men, this is not the end of an era, it's the begining of baseball season. Pitchers and catchers report tomorrow. Play Ball.....
Till Next.....
How to tell your at a bad superbowl party (Girl point of view)
10. People are wearing Team Jerseys, Team Pants, Team Jackets, and there are Team Beer Coozies around the beer.
9. There is actually a keg.
8. There is a woman who acts way too interested in the game, knows all football lingo, she is pretty, thin, single and all the men think she is funny.
7. Someone shows up wearing paint on their face.
6. They talk during the commercials and not during the game.
5. Your husband 'shushes' you when you say, "Which team is in the yellow pants?"
4. The half time show is a classic rock band. WHO you could have sworn were dead.
3. My husband is laughing at everything the girl from number 8 says.
2. Number 8 is laughing at everything my husband says.
1. The game goes into overtime. This is the turning point of my good humor.
May we all revel in the next 5 football free months! Sex and the City anyone?
9. There is actually a keg.
8. There is a woman who acts way too interested in the game, knows all football lingo, she is pretty, thin, single and all the men think she is funny.
7. Someone shows up wearing paint on their face.
6. They talk during the commercials and not during the game.
5. Your husband 'shushes' you when you say, "Which team is in the yellow pants?"
4. The half time show is a classic rock band. WHO you could have sworn were dead.
3. My husband is laughing at everything the girl from number 8 says.
2. Number 8 is laughing at everything my husband says.
1. The game goes into overtime. This is the turning point of my good humor.
May we all revel in the next 5 football free months! Sex and the City anyone?
Monday, February 7, 2011
Eight is enough......
In January of 2003 I took a job managing a very upscale Mexican restaurant. The dress code called for black dress slacks and having owned and tended bar in nothing but blue jeans for twenty years it was time to go shopping. Being the type of man I am I headed straight to the finest tailor to get a pair of custom fitted pants. Unfortunately they were closed because it was two o'clock in the morning so off to Wal-mart I went.
The selection was amazing. They had two different types of dress pants.One of them was obviously aiming for the bourgeois crowd because they wanted $19 for a pair of pants. I could get two cups of coffee at Starbucks for that. The other pair was perfect for an old clothes horse like me. Nine dollars American money. Now I know what you're thinking, "Why doesn't he just wait till tomorrow and get a cheap pair of pants?" Because that's not how I roll. Money is no object when it comes to fashion. Sure I would have to cut out a round of golf to pay for them but that is the price you pay to look the way I do.
I reported for work two days later sporting my new trousers. I'm pretty sure the place came to a dead stop when I walked in. Heads turned and everyone gave me the up and down glance. I am confident that what I saw was envy in the eyes of every man and lust in the eyes of every woman. Much like trying not to look at brilliant sunset too directly they turned away but I saw the looks anyway. When you care enough to spend almost ten dollars on a pair of pants people take notice. And it is a sight not soon forgotten. Kind of like the time you accidentally see your Grandmother naked. It leaves an impression that is not easily erased.
Fast forward to today. After my 5th diet coke of the morning I stepped into the bathroom and lowered my zipper and it split apart. The pants I had poured $9 American hard earned money into had failed me. Disbelief could be the only word to describe the look on my face. It seems like just yesterday I was tearing off the masking tape with $9 written on it. It was eight years and close to 1200 times I had worn the wonder pants and now it is over. I had a marriage that didn't last as long as my pants. Barrack Obama had barely organized his first community when they were bought. The Lions missed the playoffs the year they were bought. (Some things remain unchanged) A gallon of gas cost under two bucks. Shock and Awe happened and that was the nickname for my pants. 5000 people died in a heatwave in France. That one didn't have anything to do with the story but it still tickles me.
This is a testament to why you always pay top dollar for fashion. For eight years I have been resplendent in my black pants. Can you imagine what would have occurred if I bought the other pair. Nations may have risen and fallen from power before I gave those up. So tomorrow it's off to Wal-mart again. I will update you 2019.
Till next.........
The selection was amazing. They had two different types of dress pants.One of them was obviously aiming for the bourgeois crowd because they wanted $19 for a pair of pants. I could get two cups of coffee at Starbucks for that. The other pair was perfect for an old clothes horse like me. Nine dollars American money. Now I know what you're thinking, "Why doesn't he just wait till tomorrow and get a cheap pair of pants?" Because that's not how I roll. Money is no object when it comes to fashion. Sure I would have to cut out a round of golf to pay for them but that is the price you pay to look the way I do.
I reported for work two days later sporting my new trousers. I'm pretty sure the place came to a dead stop when I walked in. Heads turned and everyone gave me the up and down glance. I am confident that what I saw was envy in the eyes of every man and lust in the eyes of every woman. Much like trying not to look at brilliant sunset too directly they turned away but I saw the looks anyway. When you care enough to spend almost ten dollars on a pair of pants people take notice. And it is a sight not soon forgotten. Kind of like the time you accidentally see your Grandmother naked. It leaves an impression that is not easily erased.
Fast forward to today. After my 5th diet coke of the morning I stepped into the bathroom and lowered my zipper and it split apart. The pants I had poured $9 American hard earned money into had failed me. Disbelief could be the only word to describe the look on my face. It seems like just yesterday I was tearing off the masking tape with $9 written on it. It was eight years and close to 1200 times I had worn the wonder pants and now it is over. I had a marriage that didn't last as long as my pants. Barrack Obama had barely organized his first community when they were bought. The Lions missed the playoffs the year they were bought. (Some things remain unchanged) A gallon of gas cost under two bucks. Shock and Awe happened and that was the nickname for my pants. 5000 people died in a heatwave in France. That one didn't have anything to do with the story but it still tickles me.
This is a testament to why you always pay top dollar for fashion. For eight years I have been resplendent in my black pants. Can you imagine what would have occurred if I bought the other pair. Nations may have risen and fallen from power before I gave those up. So tomorrow it's off to Wal-mart again. I will update you 2019.
Till next.........
Friday, February 4, 2011
I met myself 30 years from now....And I haven't....
changed much at all. Just like that commercial where the guy is on an airplane and that smug older dude starts telling him how proud he is of him for sitting in coach. My Dad would pleased as punch with me if that was how low the bar was set. Anyway when I met my old alter ego and it was not about financial security or anything near that important.
I was driving up to Nashville and after not sleeping the night before I was having some trouble picking a lane to stay in. So I pulled into one of the approved gas stations on my list in Monteagle at the same time a large Trailways bus was pulling in. Being the impatient sort that I am I hustled to the counter with a cup of coffee to help wake me up. On my left I saw the bus starting to unload. It looked like outtakes from Dawn of the Dead. These fine folks were not in their 60's. 70's, 80's and carbon dated would be more likely. Given my sleep deprived condition I found it amusing for some reason I can't really explain.
After paying for my coffee, I turned face to face with a dozen or so of the folks waiting in line. Looking over death's waiting room a smile spread across my face and I announced this was the oldest high school cheerleading squad I had ever seen. Half the people asked the person next to them what I said and the rest kind of grinned. Or palsy had set in. But about 4 people back in a line a man about my height with a prominent nose and big ears leaned forward and looked me dead in the eye with what could best be described as a glint. "Fuck You" he loudly said and then broke out laughing. And then I started laughing. The clerk was laughing. Some of the people were laughing. And then it hit me. This was my "future commercial". The guy looked like me and certainly talked like me. As they hobbled back to the bus I felt a certain sense of satisfaction.
30 years from now I know what I will be like and where I will be. Riding a bus in the middle of nowhere buying something easily chewable from a gas station. I'll take it.
Till next......
I was driving up to Nashville and after not sleeping the night before I was having some trouble picking a lane to stay in. So I pulled into one of the approved gas stations on my list in Monteagle at the same time a large Trailways bus was pulling in. Being the impatient sort that I am I hustled to the counter with a cup of coffee to help wake me up. On my left I saw the bus starting to unload. It looked like outtakes from Dawn of the Dead. These fine folks were not in their 60's. 70's, 80's and carbon dated would be more likely. Given my sleep deprived condition I found it amusing for some reason I can't really explain.
After paying for my coffee, I turned face to face with a dozen or so of the folks waiting in line. Looking over death's waiting room a smile spread across my face and I announced this was the oldest high school cheerleading squad I had ever seen. Half the people asked the person next to them what I said and the rest kind of grinned. Or palsy had set in. But about 4 people back in a line a man about my height with a prominent nose and big ears leaned forward and looked me dead in the eye with what could best be described as a glint. "Fuck You" he loudly said and then broke out laughing. And then I started laughing. The clerk was laughing. Some of the people were laughing. And then it hit me. This was my "future commercial". The guy looked like me and certainly talked like me. As they hobbled back to the bus I felt a certain sense of satisfaction.
30 years from now I know what I will be like and where I will be. Riding a bus in the middle of nowhere buying something easily chewable from a gas station. I'll take it.
Till next......
Thursday, February 3, 2011
When cold is really hot.....
When does what you always thought was cold, become hot? The answer I heard today was that record snowfall followed by below zero temperatures was really global warming. That is what Al Gore was peddling again today. Never mind the fact Big Al stands to make billions if he can convince people to regulate carbon. Just look out your window to see if this globe is warming.
But here is where Big Al and the rest of the displaced 60's hippies who didn't go to Harvard and take a job in the Obama administration have an answer. Cold winters mean global warming is real. Huh? Is there a type of weather pattern that doesn't support their theory? Nope. Google global warming quotes from politicians for a good laugh. "The run off from the snow pack will disappear by the next decade" whined Barbra Boxer in 2005. Snow packs are at record levels this winter. The run off should be just fine. How about those rising sea levels? Nope. So if the climate starts cooling is that the end of the charade. Nope. Cooling periods are expected.
I would like to think that somewhere this started out like most projects of good intentions. But how you can alter research, forge documents, change graphs and deliberately try to omit evidence and still think people will take you at face value is beyond me. Yet the billions of dollars at stake here dictate that they will not go back to the test tubes easily. Much like Kevin Bacon at the end of Animal House they claim all is well. Baghdad Bob was more believable in his role than Al Gore is. The wizard of Oz had more credibility even after the curtain was pulled back.
Maybe the climate is changing. Few bursts of solar activity might mean a cooling period. More activity might mean we get warmer. I think we all know now that once the temperature does get to a dangerous level (if it ever does) then it will be Rush Limbaugh and Sarah Palin's fault.
Till next.....
But here is where Big Al and the rest of the displaced 60's hippies who didn't go to Harvard and take a job in the Obama administration have an answer. Cold winters mean global warming is real. Huh? Is there a type of weather pattern that doesn't support their theory? Nope. Google global warming quotes from politicians for a good laugh. "The run off from the snow pack will disappear by the next decade" whined Barbra Boxer in 2005. Snow packs are at record levels this winter. The run off should be just fine. How about those rising sea levels? Nope. So if the climate starts cooling is that the end of the charade. Nope. Cooling periods are expected.
I would like to think that somewhere this started out like most projects of good intentions. But how you can alter research, forge documents, change graphs and deliberately try to omit evidence and still think people will take you at face value is beyond me. Yet the billions of dollars at stake here dictate that they will not go back to the test tubes easily. Much like Kevin Bacon at the end of Animal House they claim all is well. Baghdad Bob was more believable in his role than Al Gore is. The wizard of Oz had more credibility even after the curtain was pulled back.
Maybe the climate is changing. Few bursts of solar activity might mean a cooling period. More activity might mean we get warmer. I think we all know now that once the temperature does get to a dangerous level (if it ever does) then it will be Rush Limbaugh and Sarah Palin's fault.
Till next.....
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
The most beautiful sound in the world has to be....
a woman singing or humming a song they truly love. The way the sound just seems to rise up and through the doors of the bathroom. Rising above all else to reach my ears at 6 o clock in the frigging morning. I don't go to bed until 3 or 4 am and to hear someone singing and humming scared me half to death. I have never heard Scarlett sing before and I don't care to ever hear it again at such an early hour. Much like little birds chirping outside my window in the spring time, both make wonderful sounds just too damn early. Ben Franklin and his early to bed early to rise crap can take it down the road. I prefer 9 am in moderation if you please.
But once the Julie Andrews portion of the morning was over the great peace conference began. Nobody can negotiate a peace treaty quite like a mother. In Matthew's view his sister had become an occupying force in the bathroom. He announced, much like the town criers of old that it was 6:25, it was 6:25 and it was 6:25 which meant he was down to only thirty minutes to brush his teeth. He knew a coalition of forces was needed to get his sister out of the bathroom so he storm trooped into our bedroom to get the negotiator. (Not Kevin Spacey, his Mother)
She convened both parties and a truce was struck. Mothers are just better at the peace treaty thing. Dad's get the fighting to stop but leave the anger for a later date. See WW1 peace treaty for an example. So once the kids were done fighting and the hills were no longer alive I got ready for a good nights (15 minutes) sleep. And then the marathon training began. Up and down the stairs they ran. I have no idea what they were getting from their rooms only that each trip up the stairs also required a slamming door to go with it. And how two people who together weigh less than 100 pounds can sound like the linemen of the Super Bowl teams combined is a mystery to me but they do. Cattle stampedes make less noise.
My new plan for tomorrow may be the right answer. Much like the quintessential Gambini in My Cousin Vinny I may have to get thrown in jail so I can get an entire night's sleep. What if I wake up to someone singing to me in a jail cell? Maybe I haven't thought this through. Perhaps a less drastic solution is needed. Ear plugs? Good luck finding some my size. They would like those old time stoppers you used to use to plug up the bathtub. One of those masks that you put over your eyes? Zoro laying on his back with his mouth open and drool coming out is not a pretty image. Best thing to do here is enjoy the morning and get back in the bed after everyone is safely off to school. Might be a good idea to turn off the phone too. Just in case.....
Till next.......
But once the Julie Andrews portion of the morning was over the great peace conference began. Nobody can negotiate a peace treaty quite like a mother. In Matthew's view his sister had become an occupying force in the bathroom. He announced, much like the town criers of old that it was 6:25, it was 6:25 and it was 6:25 which meant he was down to only thirty minutes to brush his teeth. He knew a coalition of forces was needed to get his sister out of the bathroom so he storm trooped into our bedroom to get the negotiator. (Not Kevin Spacey, his Mother)
She convened both parties and a truce was struck. Mothers are just better at the peace treaty thing. Dad's get the fighting to stop but leave the anger for a later date. See WW1 peace treaty for an example. So once the kids were done fighting and the hills were no longer alive I got ready for a good nights (15 minutes) sleep. And then the marathon training began. Up and down the stairs they ran. I have no idea what they were getting from their rooms only that each trip up the stairs also required a slamming door to go with it. And how two people who together weigh less than 100 pounds can sound like the linemen of the Super Bowl teams combined is a mystery to me but they do. Cattle stampedes make less noise.
My new plan for tomorrow may be the right answer. Much like the quintessential Gambini in My Cousin Vinny I may have to get thrown in jail so I can get an entire night's sleep. What if I wake up to someone singing to me in a jail cell? Maybe I haven't thought this through. Perhaps a less drastic solution is needed. Ear plugs? Good luck finding some my size. They would like those old time stoppers you used to use to plug up the bathtub. One of those masks that you put over your eyes? Zoro laying on his back with his mouth open and drool coming out is not a pretty image. Best thing to do here is enjoy the morning and get back in the bed after everyone is safely off to school. Might be a good idea to turn off the phone too. Just in case.....
Till next.......
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
The Bugs Bunny Tooth....A true story.
Some where in the winter of 1981 or 1982 I decided to leave work a little early. The weather was cold outside and I worked at a country club so there wasn't much to do. Everyone should believe in something and I believe it was time for a drink or two. Or three or four or five. Seven hours later it was time to go home so I ambled out to the 1969 Dodge Dart I was driving at the time and pointed it in a general direction and off I went. Somewhere about a mile from the house I took a quick cat nap and awoke to the brake lights of the car in front of me. I opened my mouth to yell and proceeded to bite the steering wheel with my two front teeth. And they broke right in half. The one on the right just hung in mid air suspended by the nerve. Ouch.
Early the next morning I was in need of some dental work. One of the members that I had played golf with was a man named Wilson who was a dentist. (No, this is not a Tom Hanks stranded on an island propping up a volleyball and yanking out his own teeth moment, his name was Wilson) Due to the fact that I was broke and he was late for his tee time I got a quick double root canal and two caps for my smile. And one of them was a lot bigger than the other. It was then named the Bugs Bunny tooth. And it stayed firmly in place for 25 years.
Until one day when my personal life was falling apart in 2006 I took a nice bite out of an apple and Bugs had left the mouth. Hitched a ride on a fast moving Golden Delicious out of town. In reality it was stuck in the apple when I looked down at it. Well that sure sucked. I had an appointment selling insurance ( I told you my life was falling apart) so I grabbed a bottle of some sort of glue from the store and got Bugs back in my head long enough to sell. Or so I thought. Half way through my enlightening display on the need for insurance, Bugs made another run for freedom. My tooth tumbled almost in slow motion before landing squarely in the middle of my future clients glass coffee table. Tink,tink,tink,tink. Always being able to think quick on my feet I grabbed my wayward crown, jabbed it onto it's post and said,"I recommend not skipping the dental insurance". They bought everything I could sell them. Just to get me out of the house.
Fast forward to today. After one hour and thirty minutes in a dentists chair Bugs is no more. The nice new front teeth will be here in two weeks and all is well. But for some strange reason I feel a sense of loss. Not for the tooth itself. It was bigger than the other one, slightly discolored and had a rough edge on the back side. No, the loss is from the memories. Painful as they were they served to remind of mistakes made and not to be repeated. It also gave me a built in excuse to not be my best. A fall back position of failure. And now it is no more. Still it does look good to look in the mirror and not utter "What's up Doc?" Hossenfeffer for dinner anyone?
Early the next morning I was in need of some dental work. One of the members that I had played golf with was a man named Wilson who was a dentist. (No, this is not a Tom Hanks stranded on an island propping up a volleyball and yanking out his own teeth moment, his name was Wilson) Due to the fact that I was broke and he was late for his tee time I got a quick double root canal and two caps for my smile. And one of them was a lot bigger than the other. It was then named the Bugs Bunny tooth. And it stayed firmly in place for 25 years.
Until one day when my personal life was falling apart in 2006 I took a nice bite out of an apple and Bugs had left the mouth. Hitched a ride on a fast moving Golden Delicious out of town. In reality it was stuck in the apple when I looked down at it. Well that sure sucked. I had an appointment selling insurance ( I told you my life was falling apart) so I grabbed a bottle of some sort of glue from the store and got Bugs back in my head long enough to sell. Or so I thought. Half way through my enlightening display on the need for insurance, Bugs made another run for freedom. My tooth tumbled almost in slow motion before landing squarely in the middle of my future clients glass coffee table. Tink,tink,tink,tink. Always being able to think quick on my feet I grabbed my wayward crown, jabbed it onto it's post and said,"I recommend not skipping the dental insurance". They bought everything I could sell them. Just to get me out of the house.
Fast forward to today. After one hour and thirty minutes in a dentists chair Bugs is no more. The nice new front teeth will be here in two weeks and all is well. But for some strange reason I feel a sense of loss. Not for the tooth itself. It was bigger than the other one, slightly discolored and had a rough edge on the back side. No, the loss is from the memories. Painful as they were they served to remind of mistakes made and not to be repeated. It also gave me a built in excuse to not be my best. A fall back position of failure. And now it is no more. Still it does look good to look in the mirror and not utter "What's up Doc?" Hossenfeffer for dinner anyone?
Monday, January 31, 2011
Poser? Yes I am.....
Any man, if he is honest, will tell you that he is a poser. Not in the traditional weight lifter checking his watch sort of way, but in the context of he is not sure at all what he is doing. Yes, we look confident but deep down inside we fear that one day it will be shown how little we know.
Women will obsess over their looks. I'm talking about beautiful women who are convinced they are ugly. Or too heavy. Or they have too many wrinkles. And yet the people around them know how radiant they are and can't understand how they can be so insecure. I get it. Security is something that doesn't come quickly or stay very long with women. And a lot of the reason is us men. We feed the notion of a "perfect" body. Or just our insensitive and boorish nature. We see women for the wonder that they are but we suck at expressing it. There is a reason.
Because while they are busy running themselves down, we are busy hiding. We hide behind the facade of the tough guy. We don't have time for self examination, we have a life to run. We have work to do. We have kids to raise. We have a wife to make happy. We have buddies that need our company. We have bosses and employees, all who need us a lot. And we are scared to death. That is exactly right. Scared. Just because we didn't cry during "The Notebook" doesn't mean we can't. We just assume the pose of tough guy instead. Fear is powerful.
And the reason we hide. The reason we pose. Because just like the model puking up lunch in the bathroom, we're never quite good enough. We spend our entire life thinking we are blowing it with our wife or girlfriend. Don't believe me ladies? Ask your man if he thinks he is doing a good job in the marriage. Even though you may think he rocks your world, he thinks he is one screw up from being on a late night chat line trying to sound young enough to go clubbing. Same at work for most of us. One bad mistake and it's over. Back to delivering pizza on a bicycle. Parenting? Don't talk to me about parenting. (Jim Mora inflection) We know our kids will think we are out of touch as soon as they are old enough to know anything. We think they will come back around but that might just be for money.
All this brings up the obvious question,"Why are we so worried?". I wish I had an answer. I really do. Lack of faith maybe. In God, our fellow man, our spouse. Could be. Upbringing. Lots of people think so. They have the theory that we are scarred early on and spend the rest of our life trying to fix it. Society puts pressure on us? Possible. But isn't pressure everywhere? For my purposes I have come up with a working explanation as to why I am a poser. And the answer I use to deal with it. The reason is because I am normal. If it is screwed up to want to be good at what you do and be loved and respected than I am screwed up. But I don't think it is. Even great athlete's get butterflies before the game. Why should a husband be any different?Or a boos? Or a father? We want to perform well and that fills us with apprehension. It sounds normal to me. Isn't it possible that all the insecurity we live with is common to almost all of us? If that is the case than aren't we all normal? In my world, the answer is yes. So, drop the pose everybody. We are all in this together and it's okay to be who you are. We are too busy dealing with ourselves to notice.
Till next.......
Women will obsess over their looks. I'm talking about beautiful women who are convinced they are ugly. Or too heavy. Or they have too many wrinkles. And yet the people around them know how radiant they are and can't understand how they can be so insecure. I get it. Security is something that doesn't come quickly or stay very long with women. And a lot of the reason is us men. We feed the notion of a "perfect" body. Or just our insensitive and boorish nature. We see women for the wonder that they are but we suck at expressing it. There is a reason.
Because while they are busy running themselves down, we are busy hiding. We hide behind the facade of the tough guy. We don't have time for self examination, we have a life to run. We have work to do. We have kids to raise. We have a wife to make happy. We have buddies that need our company. We have bosses and employees, all who need us a lot. And we are scared to death. That is exactly right. Scared. Just because we didn't cry during "The Notebook" doesn't mean we can't. We just assume the pose of tough guy instead. Fear is powerful.
And the reason we hide. The reason we pose. Because just like the model puking up lunch in the bathroom, we're never quite good enough. We spend our entire life thinking we are blowing it with our wife or girlfriend. Don't believe me ladies? Ask your man if he thinks he is doing a good job in the marriage. Even though you may think he rocks your world, he thinks he is one screw up from being on a late night chat line trying to sound young enough to go clubbing. Same at work for most of us. One bad mistake and it's over. Back to delivering pizza on a bicycle. Parenting? Don't talk to me about parenting. (Jim Mora inflection) We know our kids will think we are out of touch as soon as they are old enough to know anything. We think they will come back around but that might just be for money.
All this brings up the obvious question,"Why are we so worried?". I wish I had an answer. I really do. Lack of faith maybe. In God, our fellow man, our spouse. Could be. Upbringing. Lots of people think so. They have the theory that we are scarred early on and spend the rest of our life trying to fix it. Society puts pressure on us? Possible. But isn't pressure everywhere? For my purposes I have come up with a working explanation as to why I am a poser. And the answer I use to deal with it. The reason is because I am normal. If it is screwed up to want to be good at what you do and be loved and respected than I am screwed up. But I don't think it is. Even great athlete's get butterflies before the game. Why should a husband be any different?Or a boos? Or a father? We want to perform well and that fills us with apprehension. It sounds normal to me. Isn't it possible that all the insecurity we live with is common to almost all of us? If that is the case than aren't we all normal? In my world, the answer is yes. So, drop the pose everybody. We are all in this together and it's okay to be who you are. We are too busy dealing with ourselves to notice.
Till next.......
Sunday, January 30, 2011
The collective wife.......
One of the interesting parts of being married thrice is the unusual amount of verbal landmines that you encounter everyday. I have been fortunate enough to marry three women who were better looking, smarter, kinder and gentler than me. With that being said they will bristle up at a moments notice if they are placed in the middle of a story they did not attend. I love to tell stories and some are actually funny. But after 24 years of being married to somebody, occasionally the wrong name has been attached to the wrong location. No offense meant.
This happened Saturday night when I was story telling at Outback and I said wife instead of ex-wife. What could best be described as an icy reply came from Scarlett that she was not there. It must have been a different wife. So that got me to thinking that as a divorced man I need to use the "collective wife". This would be all things wifely in nature. Ex or current shouldn't matter when using the collective wife. Nor should pesky little details like names or faces. After all it is the "wife" I am referring to, not the individual herself. This will prevent many future arguments.
Charlie Sheen could benefit from the "collective wife" or "collective porn star". Larry King would probably live to be 100 if he could use the collective wife and not be forced to remember all those names everyday. President Clinton has already used the collective wife for nefarious purposes. That was not part of my recommendation. The collective wife is a catch all phrase for stories whose details have fallen into the crevices of the mind. Not for cigars to fall into the crevices of....well you follow my logic. The more divorces, the greater need for the collective wife.
Scarlett has been divorced and could use the collective husband but it doesn't work as well for women. Even though women forget details and the names of their current husband just as much as men do, the need for the collective is simply not there. Why? Because most men will either not hear the wrong name being spoken, or simply won't care. Unless a women is complimenting a man on his love making or his golf game he probably won't take note. He might file it away to use at a later date should some sort of irrational argument arise but for the most part it drifts away unnoticed. Being clueless has benefits. You cannot get easily offended if you are unaware. That would make us part of the "collective dumb ass". Guilty as charged.
Till next.....
This happened Saturday night when I was story telling at Outback and I said wife instead of ex-wife. What could best be described as an icy reply came from Scarlett that she was not there. It must have been a different wife. So that got me to thinking that as a divorced man I need to use the "collective wife". This would be all things wifely in nature. Ex or current shouldn't matter when using the collective wife. Nor should pesky little details like names or faces. After all it is the "wife" I am referring to, not the individual herself. This will prevent many future arguments.
Charlie Sheen could benefit from the "collective wife" or "collective porn star". Larry King would probably live to be 100 if he could use the collective wife and not be forced to remember all those names everyday. President Clinton has already used the collective wife for nefarious purposes. That was not part of my recommendation. The collective wife is a catch all phrase for stories whose details have fallen into the crevices of the mind. Not for cigars to fall into the crevices of....well you follow my logic. The more divorces, the greater need for the collective wife.
Scarlett has been divorced and could use the collective husband but it doesn't work as well for women. Even though women forget details and the names of their current husband just as much as men do, the need for the collective is simply not there. Why? Because most men will either not hear the wrong name being spoken, or simply won't care. Unless a women is complimenting a man on his love making or his golf game he probably won't take note. He might file it away to use at a later date should some sort of irrational argument arise but for the most part it drifts away unnoticed. Being clueless has benefits. You cannot get easily offended if you are unaware. That would make us part of the "collective dumb ass". Guilty as charged.
Till next.....
Thursday, January 27, 2011
I may have married Mel Gibson. Or Food Tourettes part 2
Last night Scarlett asked me if I could run by the store and pick up a few things. Accommodating gentleman that I am I agreed and she quickly wrote out a list. Seemed very average as far as list's go. Tomatoes, yogurt, blueberries, lettuce and some bottled water. Oh and some milk, soda and bread and....
So off I go and hunt my items and drag them back to the man cave. Once I got everything hauled in, I started putting away the food. It was then I noticed that to put away the new blueberries I would have to move the old ones. Same with the tomatoes. And the yogurt. And the lettuce. Then I realized this wasn't a list, it was a menu for her lunch tomorrow. Normal people will take at least a cursory glance at the current inventory before ordering more. Nope. Just fire away at whatever pops into your head. It looked like a Bing commercial. She had this far away look and just started randomly stringing perishables and non-perishable together.
After putting all the items away, my curiosity was definitely aroused. So I start really looking into our pantry. We own two open boxes of parchment paper. I am almost 50 years old and I have never seen one box of parchment paper. What the hell is it for? Wax paper I have at least heard of. We have three of those. The amount of duplicated products was astonishing and amusing. During my fits of laughter I discovered that my wife had a secret life that I was oblivious to.
Back in the right hand corner of the pantry I found some french style cut green beans. Not one, two, three, four or even five cans. There were 8 cans of french style cut green beans. And they were by different companies. Del Monte was represented. Publix brand. Green Giant would never be left out of this parade. These were purchased at all sorts of different times. Much like the Mel Gibson character Jerry Fletcher had to buy his copy of Catcher in the Rye, Scarlett has to buy green beans. Using a normal schedule we have enough beans to make a casserole for every big holiday until Christmas of 2016.
Apparently this clandestine love affair she has had with the Parisian legume has been going on before I entered her life. She kept her secret well hidden. When I asked her about the obsession she was carrying on, she broke down and admitted she even had a can at her office. In case she needed to whip up a green bean casserole for somebody coming in to tighten up a will. Just when you think you know somebody you find out about a second life. To quote Jerry Fletcher, "What do we know? If I knew what we know I would know who knew how much we know." At least I shall never go off in search of a side dish. Is it a holiday yet?
Till next.......
So off I go and hunt my items and drag them back to the man cave. Once I got everything hauled in, I started putting away the food. It was then I noticed that to put away the new blueberries I would have to move the old ones. Same with the tomatoes. And the yogurt. And the lettuce. Then I realized this wasn't a list, it was a menu for her lunch tomorrow. Normal people will take at least a cursory glance at the current inventory before ordering more. Nope. Just fire away at whatever pops into your head. It looked like a Bing commercial. She had this far away look and just started randomly stringing perishables and non-perishable together.
After putting all the items away, my curiosity was definitely aroused. So I start really looking into our pantry. We own two open boxes of parchment paper. I am almost 50 years old and I have never seen one box of parchment paper. What the hell is it for? Wax paper I have at least heard of. We have three of those. The amount of duplicated products was astonishing and amusing. During my fits of laughter I discovered that my wife had a secret life that I was oblivious to.
Back in the right hand corner of the pantry I found some french style cut green beans. Not one, two, three, four or even five cans. There were 8 cans of french style cut green beans. And they were by different companies. Del Monte was represented. Publix brand. Green Giant would never be left out of this parade. These were purchased at all sorts of different times. Much like the Mel Gibson character Jerry Fletcher had to buy his copy of Catcher in the Rye, Scarlett has to buy green beans. Using a normal schedule we have enough beans to make a casserole for every big holiday until Christmas of 2016.
Apparently this clandestine love affair she has had with the Parisian legume has been going on before I entered her life. She kept her secret well hidden. When I asked her about the obsession she was carrying on, she broke down and admitted she even had a can at her office. In case she needed to whip up a green bean casserole for somebody coming in to tighten up a will. Just when you think you know somebody you find out about a second life. To quote Jerry Fletcher, "What do we know? If I knew what we know I would know who knew how much we know." At least I shall never go off in search of a side dish. Is it a holiday yet?
Till next.......
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Perfect eyesight and big ears. What am I supposed..
to do with these things? Once again I proved that even though my hearing is perfect, my ability to listen ain't worth diddly poo. Last week I had an anniversary that I was buying a gift for. (2nd year, 3rd wife) Scarlett had been very kind and told me what she wanted. Imagine my surprise when it was the exact same gift she had requested for Christmas. That is right boys and girls, it was the same gift I didn't give her for Christmas. Who needs ears if you can't hear?
It's not the hearing part that gets you. It's the listening. I know she said that was the gift. She even sent me a link on how to buy it over the Internet. And still I didn't go for it. I didn't believe my lying eyes. Besides if I used the debit card she would see the transaction and the surprise would be gone. If I wasn't such a jackass I would have known there was no surprise because she sent me the link. How stupid can one man be? The answer seems obvious but it is not. Let me explain why being stupid isn't the problem. Human nature and being a man is the problem.
Being a man comes with certain genetic defects. Not the least of which is you think you can always do something better. When Michelangelo completed the Sistine Chapel he probably looked up and said, "Not bad, could be better". Nolan Ryan threw seven no-hitters in baseball. Nobody is even close. He lamented he should have thrown closer to ten. So when your wife tells you what gift to get, you know you can do better. Then you find out you can't get it until February 10th. In a woman's world a gift delayed is a gift denied. No matter how nice it is if it ain't on time, it ain't good. But I had a plan. Not a good one, mind you, but a plan.
See I was going to buy this cool IPhone 4 and surprise her. But it didn't happen. And then I was going to get the charm at the mall. They were out. Then I was going to get flowers and by the time I got back into town the florist were all closed. This is another one of those defects we talked about earlier. The ability to admit defeat and beg for forgiveness. One of the things women reportedly love about us men is our talent for putting your head down and getting the job done. Apparently this does not apply to screw ups. They like to know about those right away.
Well forgiveness was granted several days later and all is well. For a couple of days I was so far in the dog house when friends came over I didn't know whether to shake hands or sniff their ass. So now I am resigned to the fact that all gifts shall be purchased by those who wish to get them. And I will slink back to my man cave and try and invent the wheel. Better version.
Till next.....
It's not the hearing part that gets you. It's the listening. I know she said that was the gift. She even sent me a link on how to buy it over the Internet. And still I didn't go for it. I didn't believe my lying eyes. Besides if I used the debit card she would see the transaction and the surprise would be gone. If I wasn't such a jackass I would have known there was no surprise because she sent me the link. How stupid can one man be? The answer seems obvious but it is not. Let me explain why being stupid isn't the problem. Human nature and being a man is the problem.
Being a man comes with certain genetic defects. Not the least of which is you think you can always do something better. When Michelangelo completed the Sistine Chapel he probably looked up and said, "Not bad, could be better". Nolan Ryan threw seven no-hitters in baseball. Nobody is even close. He lamented he should have thrown closer to ten. So when your wife tells you what gift to get, you know you can do better. Then you find out you can't get it until February 10th. In a woman's world a gift delayed is a gift denied. No matter how nice it is if it ain't on time, it ain't good. But I had a plan. Not a good one, mind you, but a plan.
See I was going to buy this cool IPhone 4 and surprise her. But it didn't happen. And then I was going to get the charm at the mall. They were out. Then I was going to get flowers and by the time I got back into town the florist were all closed. This is another one of those defects we talked about earlier. The ability to admit defeat and beg for forgiveness. One of the things women reportedly love about us men is our talent for putting your head down and getting the job done. Apparently this does not apply to screw ups. They like to know about those right away.
Well forgiveness was granted several days later and all is well. For a couple of days I was so far in the dog house when friends came over I didn't know whether to shake hands or sniff their ass. So now I am resigned to the fact that all gifts shall be purchased by those who wish to get them. And I will slink back to my man cave and try and invent the wheel. Better version.
Till next.....
Sunday, January 23, 2011
I wonder if Noah had second thoughts....
when he saw the rain clouds rolling in? Seriously, he's got the family with him, the in-laws, two of every type of animal all loaded up in this ark he built himself and now the sky starts getting really dark. The llama's are spitting all over the place. Maybe it's the Alpaca's? Monkeys swinging to and fro. Crawling things and flying things. Two rabbits and now four and then eight and the thunder starts up. You look over all this around you and you would have to think,"Did I hear him right?"
But Noah walked with God is what the bible says. He got the plans on how to build it and who to put on it from the Man himself. And that got me to thinking about things. If we feel certain that we are children of God and we know his plan is for us to prosper, why are we such cowards that we argue and try and negotiate with God? Why don't we trust Him more? Why do we think we know just a little bit more than He does? Could it be by design? Stick with me.
What if God knows we are going to barter? And we all do. "You know I would tithe that whole 10% but things have been a little slow this week and I'll make it up next week." Or how about this one, "Forgive me father for I have sinned. I spent some of our rent money to buy clothes for the under privileged." Never mind the fact that the under privileged in question was a twenty year old stripper who gave you a lap dance. Or a bookie who you lost the rent money to. He knows we are flawed from the beginning so this could be His way of delivering us back to Him.
There is an old joke about the difference between people who pray in church and people who pray in casino's. The folks praying in a casino really mean it. The element of truth is there. Do the people who listen to and talk to God on a regular basis need sin? Of course not but the more they talk to Him the less sin should occur in their lives. Sounds logical enough to me.
The way I see it, and this is only my viewpoint, we don't trust Him more because we still have fear. If you consider yourself a Christian, should you ever worry? Nope. Be fearful ? Nope. Be rude or dismissive? Nope. Hateful? Nope. Jealous? Nope. And on and on. Yet we are. And we are going to be. Because if we don't sin and fall short of God's plan then we would never need His forgiveness. His grace. His love. And if we still have just a little amount of fear then we will always need His grace. Now I am not recommending knocking off a bank or any other random act of sin. I am merely trying to explain why God has.....There is your perfect example. A very flawed human being giving his take on God's plan. Tune in tomorrow for my cancer cure.
Till next......
But Noah walked with God is what the bible says. He got the plans on how to build it and who to put on it from the Man himself. And that got me to thinking about things. If we feel certain that we are children of God and we know his plan is for us to prosper, why are we such cowards that we argue and try and negotiate with God? Why don't we trust Him more? Why do we think we know just a little bit more than He does? Could it be by design? Stick with me.
What if God knows we are going to barter? And we all do. "You know I would tithe that whole 10% but things have been a little slow this week and I'll make it up next week." Or how about this one, "Forgive me father for I have sinned. I spent some of our rent money to buy clothes for the under privileged." Never mind the fact that the under privileged in question was a twenty year old stripper who gave you a lap dance. Or a bookie who you lost the rent money to. He knows we are flawed from the beginning so this could be His way of delivering us back to Him.
There is an old joke about the difference between people who pray in church and people who pray in casino's. The folks praying in a casino really mean it. The element of truth is there. Do the people who listen to and talk to God on a regular basis need sin? Of course not but the more they talk to Him the less sin should occur in their lives. Sounds logical enough to me.
The way I see it, and this is only my viewpoint, we don't trust Him more because we still have fear. If you consider yourself a Christian, should you ever worry? Nope. Be fearful ? Nope. Be rude or dismissive? Nope. Hateful? Nope. Jealous? Nope. And on and on. Yet we are. And we are going to be. Because if we don't sin and fall short of God's plan then we would never need His forgiveness. His grace. His love. And if we still have just a little amount of fear then we will always need His grace. Now I am not recommending knocking off a bank or any other random act of sin. I am merely trying to explain why God has.....There is your perfect example. A very flawed human being giving his take on God's plan. Tune in tomorrow for my cancer cure.
Till next......
Saturday, January 22, 2011
The joke is on us.
It was 3 years ago today that a very fine young actor slipped away by an accidental overdose of sleeeping pills and anti-anxiety drugs. He was also a father, son and brother. He was a champion chess player at the age of 10. A childhood star who also made it as an adult. And more than that he was anyone of us. He had sleeping issues. Insecurity gnawed at him daily despite his success. He was said to be shy without a camera rolling in front of him. But he was not a drug abuser. So what could cause that much torment to lose your own way? The part you play.
Growing up we can't help but play different parts. We can't be true to ourselves because we don't know who we are yet. But when you get older you learn who you are. And then you learn to play different parts. When you're with the guys it's time to cuss, belch and expel any other gas you care to. The more inopportune time to do so the better. Then with your lady it's time to put on the gentleman hat. Or play the kind, sensitive, caring guy that your not. Same thing at work. You have a roll to play. And you damn sure better play it the way the script is written. Don't improvise. That could screw up your marriage or career or long term freindships even.
Now here is the joke, what happens when you can't get out of character? The part you are playing becomes you. That could never happen, right? It happens to people everyday. You play the victim role in a relationship and all of sudden you forget how independant you truly are. You play the role of hard ass at work and you forget that deep down inside you want folks to prosper as much if not more than the business. But you're stuck. So many times we take the easy way out of our problem. We look to some sort of drug or thrill or bad behavior to mask the conflict we have inside ourselves. We feel hurt and mis-understood because people don't know us for who we are. Because we have become what we sought to portray.
So how do you fix it? The only way I found that works is to get out of yourself. Do something for others. It doesn't matter what it is as much as the fact it's not about you. It never really is. We all think we are the most important thing going until we realize everyone thinks that. Then it slowly dawns on you and me and everyone else that we all are in this together. And the character we are playing is already written but his role is defined everyday. Be true to your role in life. The Who said it quite well, "Who Are You?"
Till next....
Friday, January 21, 2011
No Officer, I didn't know the tire......
was on backward. Those damn donut tires are confusing anyway. And after a few adult beverages, well you get the picture. Amazingly after changing the tire and getting back in the car we still didn't drive off. My roommate had passed smooth out. And he was the designated driver. So I had to drag him across the front seat and sit him up in the passenger seat, all while Arlington's finest were watching and laughing. (They actually had two more cars show up. I thought they were back up but they were just there to get a laugh. Seriously.) Then I walked or staggered around to the other side of the car and got behind the wheel. Bad idea.
Then the flashing blue lights came on. And the spotlight into the rear view mirror. Once they coaxed me out of the car the officer asked me where I thought I was going. "Well, I was planning on going home but my designated driver passed out when I was re-changing my flat tire because cars don't move at all with a tire put on backward. Then when I moved him over to the other seat your lights came on. So now I think I will let you tell me what to do next because I'm out of ideas." Instead of getting arrested the officer asked me to drive to the parking lot on the right and stay there for 4 hours. Then he instructed me to get out of his county without hitting anything.
The reason for relating this true story of horrible judgement and incredible luck is a good one.
That donut on our car is just like fear in our lives. If it's used properly it helps you get where you are supposed to go. If used incorrectly, it will stop you from moving at all. Being afraid to fly in a helicopter with a one-armed, one-eyed pilot named Lucky is a good thing. Helps to keep you alive. Being afraid of bungee jumping off a bridge with a really thick rubber band is prudent. Being afraid of jumping into a new relationship or job might not be. Being afraid to use your talent because of rejection is not prudent, it is sad. Being afraid of forgiving someone is not smart, it is a shame. Just being afraid isn't enough justification for being less than you should be.
We are all afraid of something. No matter how tough we think we are we all have fear. And most don't ever want to admit it. But once you do a strange and wonderful thing happens. It's not as scary. Every time I have admitted being scared to someone it takes away some of the fear. I don't know how or why. It just does. And just like turning that donut around, easing that fear makes things work better. And you don't even need to be drunk to try it. Trust me.
Till next.......
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Shoot me an E-mail...On second thought just....
shoot me in the head instead. I am old enough to remember when people used to actually use the voice God gave them and talk to each other. "Reach out, reach out and touch someone" used to be a jingle from AT&T. Now it might be more like "Text me,OMG, Text me more. Back in the old days if you didn't want to talk to someone you didn't answer the phone. How do you not answer a text? I guess you can say you never got it. Yea, okay, sure you didn't. I'm not normally one to bash technology but in this case more may not always be better.
How many times has something crossed your mind and you thought, I need to give them a call and find out what that was about? Or I need to call and give them a piece of my mind. Or I'll call and ask why they can't get that right. And then you forget to call. And lo and behold what happens? The problem resolves itself. Or there was no problem at all. Or you just had an anal retentive moment and you didn't need to inject your head into the conversation at all. This used to be a regular occurrence in the world. Things that were left unsaid were probably every bit as important as things that got said. Because we all have a filter that gives us pause before we make a fool of ourselves or just look like an ass. God installed this in us and it worked. Until e-mail.
Now there is no filter. See something you don't like. Shoot an email. Somebody has a dangling participle, shoot an e-mail. You don't have time to think through an intelligent response, shoot an e-mail. Missed a meeting, shoot an e-mail. Shooting blanks, shoot an e-mail. Shooting tequila on a Saturday night, shoot an e-mail. Shooting yourself in the foot, shoot an e-mail. I've see and sent more stupid e-mails than I care to remember and I vowed to quit doing it. Now I ask myself if I would say out loud before I type it. If the answer is no than nothing gets sent.
So go ahead and fire up your email account. And if you liked this post don't hesitate to....
Till next......
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